It's a PowerSful Life

Wordless Wednesday: Some Faces

2012-02-01T09:00:00.000-05:00

Milestones

2012-01-30T11:02:00.000-05:00

Last week was HUGE in terms of developmental milestones. Simon went from sitting to his belly and it wasn't just falling on his face, although he still does that too. He also started to crawl! It's a belly crawl and he doesn't go very far, but we are mobile. I'm not sure if it's exciting or terrifying, but I think mostly exciting. He's already improved so much, the first couple of days he was working really hard to drag himself forward, now he's doing a real army crawl with his forearms and trying to use his legs. Right now that is using one foot that swings up in the air and then sometimes using that foot to push forward. He's also pretty good at the plank position, getting his belly off the ground, but hasn't figured out how to get his knees under yet. If placed on his hands and knees he will rock a bit and then slide to his belly. He can get across our rug which is 7 feet. I think he could probably go further, but he has to be motivated.

By electronics, or food, or the rabbit, or a toy. And usually if there is something far away he wants he'll go for it, but the state of our home also means there is usually something on the path closer that will distract him and being closer is the path of least resistance. Crawling has also motivated him to roll from back to belly more often to get what he wants.

I feel like I'm kind of mean when I keep pushing him to practice by placing him a few feet from his toys. But he looks so proud of himself when he gets there. Or so confused at me when I move said object just a little further away.

Simon's also gotten very busy in the last week. He'll play with the same object for a good 10 - 20 minutes. Board books he doesn't quite get, but concentrates so hard trying to turn the pages. And he has one of those shape sorter toys, which he totally doesn't know how to use yet but spends a lot of time manipulating it. Figuring things out. It won't be long.

And we got a tooth! I meant it when I said last week was huge. It's his bottom left and it is sharp. He's really been gnawing on anything hard. And my fingers. Cold carrots and apples work wonders. This first tooth didn't send us into teething misery, so I hope that is a good sign. Or maybe his sleep is already so inconsistent it just didn't seem all that different)

With his exploding motor skills and development I have a feeling we are going to soon be in a full fledged "I CAN DO IT MYSELF" phase. He already pulls the spoon out of my hand when I'm feeding him and he's already getting pretty good at feeding himself things to gnaw on - like a crust of bread. And the church nursery worker said she was helping him with a banging toy and he pushed her hands away. Mr. Independent is growing fast.

And here is the best video I have to post at the moment. It's from the iPod so excuse the quality.

The rabbit I think is his new best friend. This morning he crawled over to the cage and held the bars until I sat him up and then he held the bars and talked to Mr. Monkey for 20 minutes.
Oh, and the other new thing, so I don't forget is the shredding ad eating of paper. Magazines, church bulletin, junk mail, books I'm sure if I'm not careful.The soggy paper bits are everywhere, but he loves it so much it can buy me some relief during the evening cranky time. The downside are the bits of paper than end up in his diaper. I really a trying to limit the amount ingested...

I am seriously loving this stage.

Ten random things for Tuesday.

2012-01-24T09:53:00.000-05:00

1. Rob brought me flowers last night. Just because. It made me smile.

2. Simon woke up just before I left this morning all smiles. But at some point over night he sneezed and there was dried snot all over his face. Adorable and disgusting at the same time.

3. I've been cooking more lately because Rob's working at night and really, I don't love cooking. Baking I like, cooking is just necessary.

4. I'm having all kinds of weird food cravings. Rob told me that's just how I eat. I'm the crazy woman who craves healthy food when pregnant and the weird combos all the rest of the time. At least I'm getting back to normal.

5. I weight one pound less than I did when I got pregnant. Ideally I'd like to lose 5 more pounds. In order to do that I need to stop eating donuts.

6. Simon is belly crawling (a post in itself). Exciting and terrifying.

7. He is also getting his two bottom teeth. I hope they pop through soon because he is chewing off his fist.

8. I can't believe January is almost over. I am nowhere near ready for the semester to start on Friday.

9. This paper that I am always talking about. It's the same paper every time. Multiple drafts. But this time for reals, I only have three paragraphs to go and it will be "adviser to view" ready.

10. I heart daycare. It's awesome.

Kickshaw

2012-01-16T10:51:00.000-05:00

The list of restaurants we want to try is continually growing. Rob is a bit of a food snob - and I'm finally coming around to his way of thinking. There are so many restaurants that why waste our time going to someplace sub-par. I wouldn't say we are foodies really, because there are some places on our list of favorites that could be questionable, but we like them for various reasons (e.g. there is one and only one great dish but the overall doesn't stand up). There are also some places that are on our "do not patronize" list for bad food, bad service, or both, and we will give it a couple of goes. We are also homebodies, so walking distance is important.

But back to this list. The list is growing because we tend to frequent our favorites, we are working on branching out. So a couple of weeks ago we walked to Astoria to visit Kickshaw. "Specialty coffee, fancy grilled cheese sandwiches , craft beer in Astoria, Queens." Some friends had offered to babysit for a couple of hours, so Rob and I had a real date. It was nice. The fancy cheeses were awesome. But what really got us was the dessert.

So a week later we went. With Simon. Our weekend walks will likely be accompanied by "our car" what Mom and Chip have lovingly dubbed the stroller. So we strolled. And at some point turned Simon around so he could be in a picture too.

Kickshaw has a great vibe with a big communal table, small tables in the back, and a bar. I can see this as a place where you could sit and work and eat and drink for an afternoon. Not the most kid friendly place we've been, but having Simon wasn't a problem. We did have to park the stroller away from where we sat, but not a big deal. We had to sit at the bar this time around. Planning better around cranky time and padding in time to wait for a table would make it better to return with baby. Without baby, no problem.

Simon spent the time pounding on the bar and playing with a paper cup. Then he got cranky so Rob ate while I walked him and I ate while Rob took him outside to people watch. It was a very warm day for winter.

The dessert we got was quite awesome. A chocolate walnut brownie that was very dry, like carrot cake maybe with coffee poured over it. You get your dessert and coffee all in one dish. Amazing.

On the walk home Simon had about enough of the stroller. So we carried him the last few blocks. And he got his first ride on Daddy's shoulders. I think the hair and glasses pulling was his favorite part.

If you are local. Check out Kickshaw. With or without the kid.

Half a Year

2012-01-09T22:44:00.000-05:00

How has it already been six months? It's gone by so fast, yet it seems like it's been forever. Today is Simon's half-birthday. He's getting oh, so big. This last month has been huge in terms of development.

Just after Christmas, so at 5.5 months he went from not sitting at all to sitting with no support. Today he went to work in the lab (he's a research subject at my school) and he sat for more than 30 minutes doing different tasks. He's also started to realize that he CAN move to get the things he wants. Now he just has to figure out how to do it. He's been able to roll from both belly-to-back and back-to-belly since mid-October, just choosing not to. Until this month when he will roll to get that toy that is just out of reach. And he's started to spin on his belly to change directions. This works out well for my surround the edge of the blanket with toys to keep him distracted while I do XYZ trick. And then just today on his half birthday Simon tried to rock up to his hands and knees. He will be crawling in the next four weeks, I'm almost positive.

Simon also discovered the rabbit this month. If he's fussing and sees the rabbit he gets very calm and quiet and just stares and reaches. He still loves to stand. And he's quite good at balancing holding on to the rabbit's cage. I think Mr. Theodore Monkey will also end up being good incentive for crawling as Mr. Simon really really wants to get to him.

We did an early introduction to solids. I wasn't really planning on this, but Simon is really interested in our food. He's at the "if you have it I want it now and I don't care what it is" phase. Especially when it comes to food. Peas and beans and apples are favorites. And pizza. Yesterday I left him suck on my crust with some tomato sauce on it. Wow, that was funny to watch. Bottles are still a nemesis. But I'm starting to be ok with the fact that this is more my problem (psychologically) than an actual problem. I'm still feeding over night, so if Simon wants to wait to nurse, I can be ok with this. I think. He's really fascinated with cups and his sippy and straw cups. Both of which he CAN drink from. But only if there is water (my test liquid in very very small amounts). The second I put milk in there, no way. At least he loves food.

Sleep is still a learning process. Our lives and schedules have all been changing over the last couple of months. We bed-share more than I ever thought we would. Most nights Simon starts out in his crib and depending on how tired I am or how many times he wakes up he ends up in bed with me. Or sometimes he and I sleep on the couch from around 3. And on really cranky nights we just sleep in the big bed from the start. Other nights he stays in his crib all night (except for the eating). I'm really mostly ok with the status quo. Getting up once or twice (generally 3 and 5/6ish) at night really isn't bad, especially since that second time is technically an acceptable morning wake-up. It's the nights or weeks where it's 5+ times that are trying. Sleep training in some form may still happen, but for now we will nurse at night to make up for the lack of bottles. Ask me again at 7 months how I feel.

D-Day

2012-01-03T08:00:00.003-05:00

***The first two days were great. Then we all caught a stomach virus. It was gross.***

Today is Simon's first day of daycare, or school as I might refer to it. School just sounds nicer to me. There will be new teachers and friends to meet. In as much as you can learn and make friends at 6 months old, because he is almost 6 months old. When did that happen?

At first I thought we'd never be able to afford daycare, then I found out that a part time nanny would cost more than full time daycare - not at all places, but for the two we looked at. We visited two centers and one in home daycare. The in home situation didn't feel right for Rob or I. Both centers were nice. One was cheaper, but a bus or subway ride away. The one we chose is about 10 blocks away. Simon will go Tuesday - Thursday for this semester. In the summer I'll probably keep it at 3 days, but change them up, so there will be a break in the 3 days. In the fall we'll evaluate if we want to send him full time. I like that my schedule is flexible enough that I still get to be with Simon 2 days and the weekends. But I'm really, really excited about what it will mean to know he's somewhere where he is taken care of and I don't have to worry.

The last five months have been difficult. I do not regret that we juggled schedules and that Rob was able to stay home. Rob doesn't either. But it was tough at times. And on the days I was away, I was always wanting to rush home even though I had a ton of work to relieve Rob. And when I was with Simon it was really hard to just "be" with him and not think about all the work I needed to do, but couldn't. I kind of hate how much I don't want to be with Simon all the time. But I want to use the separation productively. And then really make the time I do have with him count.

Simon isn't exclusively breast fed, but he would like to be. On the days I'm away I pump - oh I hate the pump - and we try bottles. On a good day he'll eat 5 ounces (about half of what he should be eating) but usually less. This is one reason we are not sleep training. If he's actually hungry I will feed him, if he hasn't eaten all day, I can only assume he's hungry. Here's hoping daycare can fix the bottle aversion. He is fascinated by the sippy cup, but hasn't quite figures it out. I got him a straw cup, score, he sucked out a bit of water, so in went the breast milk, and no dice. Oh, how this baby and his eating habits frustrate me. We started him on a bit of food this month. It's earlier than I originally planned, but he LOVES it so much. If it's on my plate he wants it now. And he'll pull a spoon out of my hand, but he can't feed himself yet obviously. For the first month of daycare he's bottles only because I don't want him to fill up on what should be food to experiment with rather than milk, which is the primary nutrition. We'll see how it goes. They will provide all food though, which is nice.

The center is also willing to use cloth diapers. This excites me because it means not having to spend money on disposables. The state regulations state that diapers must be one piece so they can't use the pre-folds and covers we favor. But gDiapers with the cloth inserts are fine, as are our BumGenius (which are our overnight diapers). We got some FuzziBunz for Christmas and some Fancy Pants. I don't love gDiapers as they tend to leak. If one of the other brands really works then I think I may sell those as well as a few others that we don't love and buy a few more of what we like. It's a little thing, but it makes me happy they will accommodate.

I'm looking forward to this. I'm not worried, but I'm sure I will spend most of the day checking my phone every 10 minutes making sure there are no calls. One upside of starting in January rather than February (that's when the spot was open) is that I am working from home for the most part so there will be a nice transition period where I am close by. Everything will be fine as we enter this next stage where Rob has full time employment, I have a structure I better stick to in order to get all the school stuff I need to do done, and Simon is starting school, it's exciting.

The daycare bag: crib sheet, light blanket, lovey, extra bibs, change of clothes, diapers, wipes, wetbags, notebook for daily reports, medical form, birth certificate, and check. we are ready.

Words to live by: Intent

2012-01-02T09:00:00.000-05:00

The last few years I've seen bloggers choose a word of the year. I like the concept, but never had a word that seemed right. This year I have a word or words.

intent. intentional. with purpose. by design.

I want to be more thoughtful about my actions in all areas of my life. I want to continue on the path we've slowly been moving toward. We are pretty good about creating less waste, we use cloth napkins and rags for cleaning. We cloth diaper. We have learned to distinguish between wants and needs and buy so much less than we once did. But there are still the occasional splurges and binges. I want to buy with purpose and try and buy used when possible. I want to find ways to create less waste. We really don't NEED much. I am pretty content with the material things, and would like to purge more. I want there to be intent behind things we bring into our home.

I eat a lot of junk food. I have a sweet tooth. Rob like vegetables, so that has changed my diet some. Last summer we joined a CSA and ate so many vegetables I have never tried. Who knew I loved beets? I want to be more intentional about the food I buy and prepare. I really do buy into the whole "whole food" movement. But I am lazy and prepared foods are so darn convenient. The CSA made us eat healthier than I ever have before, I want to continue on that path.

I need to be more intentional with how I manage my time. I waste so much time checking email a million times a day or facebook when there are no new updates. With Simon and school and being a wife and all the things I have going on I need to be better at using my time wisely. So working with intent and staying on task when I am at school or with students will allow me to be more present when I'm with Simon and at home, and not distracted. I also need to have purpose with my time on line. When blogging or checking email or Pinterest or whatever I may be doing, I need to be more intentional with my time and when I'm done, shut down. And then go back to focusing on my family.

We'll see how this all goes. Nothing is a huge change, but some readjustments to how I approach life.

Welcome 2012.

The Obligatory Year End Post

2012-01-01T21:40:00.000-05:00

I was going to write this yesterday. Then decided not to partially because I didn't quite know how to word it or what I wanted to say. So here I am on January 1, New Year's Day. I don't see the need for a recap of my year post, the blog archives are here, and needless to say this has been a life changing year. I did have a baby after all.

But I also completed two more semesters of my PhD program (only one more semester of coursework) and presented my research at poster sessions at two national conferences. There was a lot of stress - I don't remember the month of March and didn't blog, so I really have no record of what I did.
What I really want to recap though, is the state of the blog. It starts in the summer of 2010 when I went to BlogHer and was so timid I didn't really network like I could have. But I did get new blogs to read and at the start of 2011 I became active on Twitter. In the archives I saw the first outreach of my new blog friends - I ordered Girl Scout Cookies from a fellow blogger. I also started commenting regularly on blogs. Mostly smaller blogs like mine, and I got responses! Wow, more blog friends. The summer of 2010 I was also hoping to have a baby, and started reading infertility blogs. The IF blog community is amazing. Since I never blogged as an IF blogger and got pregnant after only 2 treatment cycles I hesitantly eased into this community. These women are knowledgeable and were more helpful throughout pregnancy than any book. I found a few NYC bloggers and started commenting some.

Throughout all of this I started getting comments back!

My little blog is read by people, I did install a counter at the bottom, I average a couple hundred views a month. And occasionally I get comments from people I don't know on blogs I've never heard of, so more blogs for me to read. I kind of love blogging.

This year was my fourth blog-o-versary. I have plans for year five. I want to continue to comment on blogs and make more bloggy friends. I am attending BlogHer again this year (it's in NYC) and my goal is to be less timid. And hopefully meet some more bloggers, maybe get lunch or coffee. We'll see. I want to get my own domain name, I'm excited about that. I'm toying with the idea of adding adds. I don't plan on ever making a living from blogging, but it's a hobby that isn't going anywhere, so why not profit a little from it? If I can figure out the Amazon affiliate program (it is more of a taking the time to do it) then I can get a bit back from my own shopping on Amazon anyhow. It's really time for me to take my blogging seriously.

This year I noticed the biggest change in how I right. I don't classify myself as a specific type of blogger, I blog about my life since this started as a way to keep my family informed about my exploits in the city. I am a mom now, so Simon will figure in as heavily as Rob always has. But with my pregnancy my writing became more of a journal for me at times. I like that record of my feelings. And because I'm not just blogging for Mom (who doesn't read the words anyhow, she's more of a picture type of gal) and people are actually out there, I have changed to write for my audience, whoever that may be. I want to keep journaling some and write openly. I want to find a way to write a bit about school - in a way that won't get me fired.

I'm excited about how this little blog has changed in 2011 and am looking forward to what this new year brings.

Chirstmas Recap in Photos

2011-12-29T18:46:00.000-05:00

This year we did a technological Christmas and Skyped with various family members throughout the day on The 24th and 25th. The kid loves screens, so it actually kind of works.

Simon is too little to get Christmas, but he loves the lights. And the paper.

I loved getting to wake up and have a quiet morning before church to have family time and a few presents.

After church Val and Josh came over for dinner. I cooked. Rob helped. I didn't actually take a single picture of the meal or the table. But I did use the desert dishes from my china for the first time. I'm usually too tired by desert time to use them. All the visitors were a bit of over-stimulation, but Simon did finally take a nap at 4:40. But he loves his Uncle Josh.

I've been working on learning Photoshop to edit photos. More on that to come.

Good Christmas.

Merry Christmas

2011-12-25T09:11:00.000-05:00

God rest ye, little children; let nothing you affright,

For Jesus Christ, your Saviour, was born this happy night;

Along the hills of Galilee the white flockes sleeping lay,

When Christ, the Child of Nazareth, was botn on Christmas Day.

Dinah Maria Mulock Craik

Grinch

2011-12-24T11:00:00.001-05:00

I can't believe it's Christmas Eve. I'm so not mentally ready. Physically we've been prepping. We have a tree. I made stockings. Oh, I am glad I made the stockings. I had a little procrastination on Pinterest weekend in mid-November. If it weren't for these things, and the presents family have been mailing in, it would be just like any other weekend.

Mentally I'm spent. This semester was HARD. And not really so much because of the baby factor. That was part of it. But teaching two classes (instead of my usual one) meant double the students and their issues and grading. I feel like I spent most of my week dealing with teaching and that left very little work for my research and class that I was taking. I spent four days this week grading. And trying to finish the last bit of data entry for my thesis, which was due in October, but the final meeting about was yesterday. I have until January 17 to write the results and discussion. I'm spent. But in May I will have my En Route Masters and in August I will hopefully be ABD. Aren't you proud of me mom? And because Christmas Eve and Day are on a weekend, it just doesn't seem like I get any time off. Hence the meeting yesterday, where I only cried twice. But that's because I'm so dang tired because someone - I won't name names - has decided that eating during the day is not nearly as much fun as having an all night party recently.

But last night I did something I've only done twice before. I put Simon to bed, I pumped, and I went to sleep with my head buried under a pillow. And Rob took the night shifts. Where Simon refused the bottle. But did figure out that it was the bottle or nothing, and he went back to sleep. I feel better this morning. Not like the zombie I was yesterday and the day before. We might try it again tonight.

Last night we went to the local Pub for dinner. Simon rocked eating the mushy peas. And I mentioned that I had seen somewhere on Pinterest Christmas Tree Waffles. And we were planning on waffles this morning anyhow. And Rob made me these.


green waffles with chocolate and powdered sugar and a bacon tree trunk

Then we Christmas facetimed with my Dad and siblings and opened some presents, and I think I might just be feeling a little Christmassy now.

I'm not checking school or student emails until January 2 for a self-proclaimed vacation. Kicking myself a little for not pulling out the camera this morning. I will NOT forget for the next round of presenting.

Merry Christmas to one and all!

Riley's Dol

2011-12-23T20:24:00.001-05:00

One year ago Riley joined this world a few weeks earlier than planned. Last week we celebrated his first birthday.

With good friends we celebrate and hope our kids grow up good friends too. Parties for babies have lots of adults, but lots of babies and kids too.

Part of the Korean tradition is for the birthday boy to choose his path in life. At this party he chose academics.

Simon got to play with his friends.

And then we ate cake.

The adults did anyhow.

Happy Birthday Riley!

Christmas Card

2011-12-21T09:53:00.000-05:00

If you are very good I might to a behind the magic post for the technologically challenged.

Monkeying Around

2011-12-18T09:05:00.000-05:00

With matching hats of course we had to get some pictures. Here we are at Bryant Park. Don't worry it was a really warm night.

P.S. Simon has outgrown that shirt in the past week...

Santaland

2011-12-16T09:00:00.000-05:00

It wouldn't be a first Christmas without a visit to Santa. So we went to Macy's, because when you want to see Santa you go to Santaland.

The line wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, we waited 30-45 minutes, but there is so much to look at that it really didn't seem that long.

And the Santa was great (we know the guy) and knew all kinds of stuff about us, like telling me we should make sure to put out cookies - if I didn't eat all the dough first (Rob filled him in on this habit prior), so when Simon is bigger - super fun.

Simon was not in his smileyest mood, but being 6pm and cranky time, not screaming was kind of a miracle.

Five Months

2011-12-15T11:00:00.000-05:00

next month I post the progression in this outfit, which was mine.

Wow! Five months already. Actually last week. I'm guessing around 11 months I'll finally get a month post up on the actual day. This month showed lots not new things. Mastery of jumping is number one. Oh, how he loves the jumper, there have been multiple occasions where we've left him for a few minutes only to come back to the room and find him sound asleep face planted on the seat with arms grabbing the toys. His smiles are so so big when he jumps and kicks.

There is no real rolling action going on. He can roll, he just doesn't much anymore. Simon is now reaching for toys and books. He can get almost everything to his mouth in a fluid motion now. He may have destructed the indestructible book. Simon can sit still and look at pictures when we read to him. I've showed him a few episodes of Yo Gabba Gabba and Scholastic read alouds. He's got about 5 minutes of attention, but he sits so still.

Simon is at this lovely stage where he can lay on his blanket with a couple of toys and entertain himself for long enough for me to take a shower or eat lunch and sometimes even long enough to do some school work. He still loves lights. And music. I made a playlist of all the baby friendly music, we play it alternating with the Christmas music. The smiling and laughing is so much fun.

The crying and refusal to eat and sleep is not so much fun. He still refuses a bottle on Dad days except for just enough to keep from starving. He is then cranky and will cry. A lot. Then when I get home he makes up for it by eating all night. Some days it seems like we are getting better, then we are not. This month has been rough for the sleep. We went from waking once or twice to four or five times a night. I think this is because we also had our first sick baby visit. Just a cough, Simon isn't so bothered by it, and the doctor said it is just a virus. But not feeling well would make me wake up too.

Simon also went to work for the first time. I took him to the baby lab at school to participate in his first research study. He will go back every few months for different studies about motor development. Kind of cool.

At five months we get to start food. Simon loves to eat. We also got a sippy cup. He loves to play with the cup and suck on it, just not when there is anything in it. This will be worked on because January 3 we start daycare three days a week. Such a big boy.

Wordless Wednesday: In Awe

2011-12-14T09:00:00.001-05:00

A very Tuba Christmas

2011-12-13T09:00:00.001-05:00

Sunday was the day that I finally got to go to a TUBACHRISTMAS. I first heard of this about five years ago when my cousin Tyrone was conducting one in the Philly area. I looked it up and have been trying to go to the NYC concert at Rockefeller Plaza for a few years. Something has always been going on, so this year I put it on the schedule.

We bundled up Simon and into the city we went. (Please note this is the day after IU's awesome win, so of course he wore his IU hat and gloves. It's a plus that they match the sweater.)

We saw the tree.

We heard some tubas.

We sang along.

I love Christmas in New York.

Trimming the Tree

2011-12-12T09:00:00.000-05:00

Oh Tannenbaum

2011-12-10T09:00:00.000-05:00

Growing up, we always had a fake tree. I remember exactly one year where we had a real tree, which is now planted in front of my childhood home. Since being married, we've put up a small fake tree I brought with me from Indiana. It is worth storing the small tree 11 months a year because it's easier than dealing with a dead tree after traveling would be. This year we are not traveling.
This is momentous. We are not traveling for the holidays. We are staying home. Santa will visit Simon here. We will go to church. I will cook dinner. There will be no flights and driving hundreds of miles, and stress about traveling in a blizzard.

So we planned to get a real tree, meaning one that was once alive. In honor of my maiden name we went with the Fraser Fir (different spelling, but close enough). This particular variety also has pretty sturdy branches which is key in my opinion. This being the first real tree I've ever purchased, I started checking out tree prices at various locations.

Then, I saw it, a stand not too far away "Six Foot Trees $24.95" Done. This is a great deal. So we packed up Simon and made the trip over. We picked a tree $75. What? Oh, the $24.95 trees advertised, those are only the ones on this rack off to the side and they are some variety with flimsy branches and not so full and the top 2 feet of the 6 feet is the single bare branch that is going to get cut off. So we picked another tree. $50. Still to munch.

We went to Home Depot, where the prices were perfectly acceptable. Chose a lovely tree. Had the bottom cut.

And carted it home. For those of you who wonder how we do it without a car. This is it. There was a man walking with us carrying his tree. He saw our cart and said he wished he'd thought to bring one. And I love it. The house smells so nice.

The problem I have with the whole buying a Christmas tree thing, is the false advertising. Because really, there were very few trees for $24.95. And when measuring the heights that 7 foot tree is really 5.5 because that top branch is useless and must be trimmed for placing a topper. But really I love my tree, so I'll get over it.

Holiday Teaser

2011-12-09T21:44:00.000-05:00

This is my first post this month. Usually I post a lot in December. At first I was planning on doing a 25 days of Christmas. Then I was going to do some advent posts. Then I got crafty and started Christmasing, and decided to enjoy the holidays without stressing over getting pictures to the blog each night. But tonight is the night. I have a few posts coming up, and Rob is helping me learn photoshop to edit pictures! Aren't we romantic. So I will leave you with these teasers of the fun we've been having.

Swingin'

2011-11-28T09:00:00.003-05:00

I love the playground. 

 Simon doesn't hate it. 

 At 4.5 months I think that's the best I can hope for. 

 On this unseasonable warm holiday weekend, we made family outing to the neighborhood playground for some swinging. 

 Simon may not love the swings, but he does love his mama, so we got to see some of those dimples that I love so much.

One more pound...

2011-11-27T16:37:00.000-05:00

to go that is. Until I'm to my pre-pregnancy weight. But I'm never going to get there if I keep baking and eating like this.

I've been baking a lot recently. It's to fill that need of a little morsel of chocolate at night. If you know me well, you know that I really love cookie dough. The actual cookies, I'll eat one or two usually and I've had my fill. So we go through a batch of cookies every week or so. Then a few weeks ago Rob handed me the 48 oz bag of chocolate chips we keep on hand. Because if there are no cookies to be had, a few chips make a lovely late night snack. But as he was handing me the store brand bag of chips, he saw the recipe on the back of the bag. PUMPKIN CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES. For whatever reason, we often have a can or two of pumpkin pie filling on hand - probably because pumpkin pancakes on a winter weekend are awesome - so we had all of the key ingredients. Because the recipe calls for a whole can of filling it ends up being a double recipe, making 5 - 6 dozen cookies depending on the size.

I made these on Friday night. Sunday afternoon they were gone. I could. not. stop. eating them. For snacks. For meals. For desert. They have the texture of muffins and the taste of pumpkin, a breakfast food right? I didn't post about them before, because there was no picture taken. But last night I made them again. And they are just as good this time around. So thank you store brand chocolate chips for giving me my new favorite cookie recipe. I'm adding the word pie because I imagine that if you wanted a really decadent desert adding some whipped cream or ice cream would make them kind of like pie. And really you should plan on gifting some of them. Otherwise you too could eat 5 dozen cookies in two days.

Pumpkin Pie Chocolate Chip Cookies

4.5 cups flour
2 cups sugar
3.5 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice (or 2 tsp allspice, 1 tsp nutmeg, 0.5 tsp cloves)
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt

Mix all of the dry ingredients in a large bowl.
Then mix in:
1 16 oz can of pumpkin pie filling (I use Libby's)
1 cup vegetable oil
2 eggs
2 tablespoons milk
1 teaspoon vanilla

Once that's all mixed up stir in 2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips. Or don't, because they are still pretty darn good without. (I had a couple with no chips from scraping the bowl.)

Bake at 375 for 15 minutes.

The finished product will be a little spongy and soft, like a muffin.

Yum!

Thankful

2011-11-24T20:23:00.000-05:00

Thankful for a happy healthy baby. Despite the exhaustion and hard work, Simon's smiles and laughs are the absolute best. He's growing and changing so fast. It's hard to believe it's only been four months, it seems like forever.

Thankful for Rob who has been a stay-at-home dad, while I work many hours at school this semester. Happy that this schedule will soon be changing. I can do anything for a short period of time. Grateful that Rob and Simon got the good together time during unemployment. We are lucky we've been able to rely on savings to get through this and allow for family bonding. Hoping that a job will come soon.

Thankful for family. We are blessed.

Baby Dances

2011-11-18T11:09:00.001-05:00

After 20 minutes of this he played himself to sleep. And after three days of moving him to the crib and he wakes, today he is napping here too.

4 months

2011-11-16T09:08:00.000-05:00

And you are getting so big. 14 pounds now and 26.5 inches tall! This month has been huge in growth for interactivity. We can roll from belly to back and back to belly. You did each for about a week, all the time, and now only occasionally. I think it's because you don't get much from it yet. I think that in a few more weeks you will use your rolling to help you get places. Right now you are still coordinating all of your limbs. Your arms are less spazzy now. You are starting to reach for things with purpose. Any toys in your hand or within reach go straight to the mouth. If there are no toys then your burp rag, fist, arm, my hand or arm will all work just fine. I'm not sure how you do it, but your inchworm technique is moving you pretty well. It's slow, but sometimes I find you off the blanket. You are sitting pretty good with support, and tummy time is no longer torture. You can hold your head and body up for quite a long time and enjoy babbling to whatever print is on the blanket of the moment. On your 4 month birthday we got a jumperoo, I think you are going to really love it. This month flew by. I worked a ton, so lots of daddy-baby time was had.

Some days you really throw tantrums. Then you both fall asleep.

You are a drooling machine. You can soak through a bib in 10 minutes. Your face is covered in drool rash. You love to suck on apple slices, and once a grape - that almost ended badly though, so no more grape for awhile. Eating food is still a month or two away, but we are ok with you getting little tastes right now. Mostly the fruit has gone over well. You love to sit on our laps while we eat and look at the food. You laugh and talk all the time now. You can blow razberries, so we do that a lot. You also found "the baby in the mirror." You are really responding to our voices now. When I get home you smile when you see and hear me. Same for Dad. Mostly still vowel sounds, but the babbling is increasing. You are just starting to entertain yourself, where I can leave you for 20 minutes or so. I hope this trend continues and my productivity will increase greatly.

And you took your first flights to Indiana to visit all the grandmas and grandpa. You flew quite well, although the downside for flying with a baby is we can't sleep on the flight. Babies sleep just fine. Since you refused to nurse on the take-off and landing you were awake for, we were happy this trick was shared - blow in his face to make him breathe and swallow. It stopped the crying anyhow since you would not suck. You also really liked looking out the window. On the way there, we flew business class, the extra room was nice, and you slept the whole time.

The way home we flew coach, but I used a trick I read on a blog somewhere and booked the window and aisle seats, and we lucked out and no one took the middle, so that was nice. Airport security was surprisingly easy. They let me keep you in the carrier and just tested my hands after walking through the x-ray. Way easier than having to take you off and wake you up... Grandma has a carseat and we borrowed a stroller there, so we didn't travel with those this time around.

I was going to brag about sleep here. But last night we were up every two hours. So it's not great, but it's not awful either. I can't yet bring myself to be consistent with sleep training, but the current wake up all the time is working ok for now. Some nights are really really awesome.

To Grandmother's House We Go

2011-11-11T16:46:00.000-05:00

Simon love Grandma's house. There was a new ball toy. And lots of rest.

And a wedding.

And a trip to Madison, and visiting with aunts and uncles and great-grandmas.

Lots and lots of driving. And lots of loving on Grandma.

And to make it a real vacation Mom and Chip took on night duty a few night. And Rob and I got to sleep. This is how I found them one morning. Rough night.

But the best part of the trip was hearing Simon really find his laugh.

It's so cute you'll cry.

Baby in the Mirror

2011-11-08T13:50:00.001-05:00

I have a lot of things I would like to have time to do. Like start sewing Simon's quilt that Mom and my sister-in-law cut all the pieces for over the summer. But Simon is time consuming and I barely have time to get school work done, I'm in a constant state of "I'm going to get fired" except it's school and they don't fire you.

And I'm far from being so behind as to get kicked out. So for my hoby time I mostly stick with blogging, sometimes one-handed while Simon eats.

But last week the hot glue gun was out from our Halloween costume extravaganza. So, I did find the time to do a project that has been in my brain for some time. While watching NCIS: LA because I'm a multi-tasker.

Simon really loves to play with the baby in the mirror. And ever since I went with the "not a common baby theme" nursery decor, it's hard to match. I've been wanting to get a crib mirror, but I didn't want treetop friends or farm animals, or Disney characters, I wanted ROBOTS.

So I bought some felt and a piece of orange foam at Michael's, and Rob found me a square plastic mirror at one of the art stores. It's not a flex material like I would find in a ready made crib mirror, but it is plastic so I'm making do.

These materials have been moved around our apartment for the last couple of months. Last week I started cutting robot parts, and letters, and shapes. I glued the felt on to the foam frame.

I used the half for a back that was about an inch bigger than the mirror all around. The front frame overlaps a quarter inch all around so there are no sharp edges available.

Some felt ties and a few minor glue burns and now Simon can play with the baby in the mirror whenever he wakes up. I love how this turned out.

I really like being crafty, there just aren't enough hours in the day right now.

Hail to Old IU

2011-11-05T09:26:00.000-04:00

Last weekend I was fortunate enough to get to take Simon to Bloomington for the first time. I just love IU's campus. We took some pictures around campus.

Showalter Fountain and the Auditorium

At the Sample Gates.

Here Simon is saying hi to Herman B. Wells.

We also went to the IU vs. Northwestern game. I played in the alumni band, which was so much fun. I forget during the year how much I like playing the trombone. The game itself was kind of depressing. More than half the crowd left during the 4th quarter we were loosing so bad. Simon didn't like the game much at all. Too loud for him. He fussed through most of the game, and as soon as we exited the stadium and it was quieter, he got so happy.

Vince and I covering the babies ears.

Strategy

Go Hoosiers!

Girls and babies

We also got to meet Clara for the first time, and see Charlie as a big kid. I love that I get to see my best college friends at least once a year. These guys are the best.

Happy Halloween

2011-10-31T22:12:00.000-04:00

Last year I found out I was pregnant just before Halloween. At the Halloween party we went to Ghostbusters was on. I saw the Marshmallow Man and decided that it would be the perfect costume for baby this year. I've had a whole year to plan this. I even borrowed the white puffy snowsuit back in April (besides that costume it will come in handy during the snow season). So why were Rob and I using the hot glue gun to make the felt pieces at 5pm today. After the long trip and the long day today a part of me wanted to say "forget it". I'm so glad we didn't.

Our neighborhood is an awesome place for kids and trick-or-treating. Many neighborhoods in NYC have all the stores hand out candy. The stores here do that, but there are enough single family homes that kids can go door to door too. Watching the kids knock and yell trick-or-treat, and seeing the decorations and costumes people have while handing out candy, makes me excited for when Simon is old enough to walk and talk and have some idea of what is going on. As it is we got a handful of candy "for the baby" which I didn't expect, and some great pictures of the first Halloween. Isn't he just the cutest!

Madison

2011-10-29T09:00:00.002-04:00

Poor Simon has spent so much of this trip in the car seat. He kind of hates it. There is lots of fussing, but some sleeping. My mom got an infant seat for her car. And while I do see the benefit of being able to pop out the seat and take the baby in, or put the seat into a stroller, I find the seat heavy and cumbersome. We've hardly used the Ergo.

On the trip to Madison we got to spend a couple of days with my Grandma Frazier and Dad. Emily took a day off to spend some time with us too. Auntie Em brought Yumi, Simon got his first encounter up close with a dog.

We took a trip downtown to eat some lunch at Hinkles. Then we walked around downtown and on the river. We stopped at the playground. Em took him on his first slide.

And then we tried the swing. Again. He's got enough body control to sit in the swing now, but he's still to little to really enjoy it.

Papa loves Simon.

And while we were walking we found our family brick from 1987 when they first put in the river walk.

Family picture. I kind of like this one.

Aunt Patty came to visit.

And before we left we had a little family dinner. This was the first time in awhile that all siblings and Dad have been together. Clint was a little embarrassed that we had the waitress take a picture because "we live here" but I'm glad we got it.

Three Months, Two Goals

2011-10-28T09:00:00.000-04:00

After Simon was born, and maybe a bit before, I had two goals for mid-October. First I wanted to have lost enough weight to wear my suit for a presentation I had for school. I met that goal. I still have about 6 pounds to go to my pre-pregnancy weight, but I'm right around my wedding weight, which is when I bough the suit.

The second goal was to be able to walk over the bridge to Simon's 3 month pediatrician visit. We used to walk the bridge to Manhattan several times a year when it was nice out. But this past spring I was too pregnant for a 4-5 mile walk. And then I was recovering this summer. I thought 3 months would be a good length of time to give myself and the weather would still be nice. Honestly I think I probably could have walked to the 2 month appointment.

So we loaded up the stroller, had some coffee and our water bottles and took off. We usually walk Queens Boulevard, but this time we walked a block over to avoid the noise of the 7 train. There has got to be a prettier street to walk. Maybe next time we'll find it.

There has been construction at Queensboro Plaza for the past couple of years. It's been so that they could put this park and bike/walkway in. I have to say it's nice to no longer have to climb over the construction barriers to cross the street.

We made it across the bridge and to Dr. B's upper east side office in about an hour and 15 minutes. Not too much slower than our pre-stroller average time. Pushing a stroller makes the bridge a tougher climb. Simon slept most of the way.

Simon did great at the appointment, only fussing a little for his shots. He didn't pee on the doctor this month. And he likes looking at the fish in the waiting area.

We saw the Northern Lights

2011-10-27T15:00:00.000-04:00

Back Home Again

2011-10-27T13:24:00.000-04:00

Last Thursday we got up very very early (2:30am) to go to the airport so that we could fly to Indiana and meet some very important people.

Simon did great on the plane. He slept on the first flight. He was a little fussy in Atlanta, but slept and looked out the window on flight number 2. We got to Indiana, ate some lunch. The Rob and I handed Simon off to grandma and took a nice long nap. I didn't get a picture of Simon on the plane, but here we are waiting in the airport at 5am.

Queens County Farm Museum

2011-10-24T06:49:00.000-04:00

We used to go apple picking or at least cheesecake and cider donut buying at Rob’s favorite orchard upstate-ish. (I’m still not entirely sure how far north you have to be before you are considered “upstate”) Last year we took friends, six adults in total. This year there are four babies added to the mix and the logistics of trying to go and having to rent multiple vehicles made my head hurt. But, then I saw some pictures some friends took at the Queens County Fair. Did you know Queens had a county fair? I didn’t but I want to go next year. Although I’m guessing it’s quite a bit different than the county fair I grew up with in Indiana. But it’s at the Queens County Farm Museum.

I was looking at the details because a farm in the city, of course I want to visit. And they have an apple festival. And a CORN MAZE! So we planned a trip for the Sunday morning. And walked around with sleepy babies who are too little to care about the animals. But next year, next year Simon will LOVE it. We toured through the apple festival, and I will admit I wasn’t much impressed. A few really big bins of apples to pick out and purchase. Some apple cobbler and other fried apple goodness and a tent with pie. That was about it. Whatever, we’ll still go back because it’s a real live farm…in Queens!

I grew up on a farm. When I was in high school all our family friends with little kids would come over so we could go look at the cows. I want Simon to have that. I want him to know about cows and chickens and sheep and pigs. They have a petting area set up where you can feed the animals. It’s also a working farm with a garden. And a cornfield. That is turned into a MAIZE MAZE. This I was excited about. I’ve always wanted to do one, but most that I had seen were far out in Long Island or New Jersey. This may not be the biggest or flashiest, but it got the job done.

The maze was totally worth the $18 we paid to go through. I felt like I was in Gilmore Girls, you know the episode with the Haybale Maze. We had a flag and a clue sheet. There were mailboxes throughout the maze with pieces of the map that you could get and tape together. There was also baseball trivia, because the maze was in the shape of a baseball player and ball field. We were all cool like “we don’t need the map, this will be easy.” But we picked up the map pieces anyway and I got the trivia because I like trivia and made our way through the maze. After about 15 minutes we saw the end. And I was a little sad we had paid and got through so fast. But we found the end without using the map. As we walked to the stairs of the bridge to get out we realized that we were in the wrong path. Oops. I guess we were a little lost in the maze. So we wandered around got some more map pieces and came to the end. Only to find we were still lost! I guess the map really is helpful… We made our way back to a spot we could locate on the map and then tried again. This time turning down a path we had previously avoided. We made it out in 47 minutes.

Next year maybe the kid will stay awake.

Mid-terms

2011-10-17T21:26:00.000-04:00

Last week I gave mid-term exams. Here is what I said to my students at the start of the exam.

"To take the exam you need a scantron and a pencil. (pause to sell scantrons to students who didn't bring them and hand out pencils) On the scantron please put my name and the course section number 4882 in the period spot.

There are two important pieces of information you need to make sure you include. Your name, if there is no name on the test I cannot give you a grade. (class laughs) And the test version number. There are four versions A, B, C, and D. Put this letter in the Test No. spot. If you do not have a version number I also cannot give you a grade because I won't know what test you took. (class laughs again)

Any questions? (pause) No, ok, we are ready to begin. Please put away all laptops, phones, books, and notes. Don't make it look like you are cheating. If it looks like you're cheating you probably are. (more laughter) Begin."

Do you even want to know how many tests I got back without version numbers? At least they all remembered their name...

As the student turn in the exams I check them, because I'm nice like that and if they are missing something I hand it back to them. Then they get all embarrassed and put the version on for me.

This is my life.

How did I get a red-head?

2011-10-14T13:44:00.000-04:00

And other things I didn’t expect about becoming a mom.

see the red hair?

I didn’t expect that I would have a baby who looked just like me at birth. It was so weird to have a mini-me. He looks more like Rob now. He has blue eyes and dimples (which I love). But how on earth did I get a red-head?

I didn’t expect that I would have a newborn that never wants to stop moving. He doesn’t like being in the same position for more than 5 minutes most of the time. He only did that newborn snuggle sleep on your chest thing for about 2 weeks. He snacks All. Day. Long. Because the world is more exciting than eating. At least he did before the reverse cycling turned hunger strike.

I didn’t expect that I wouldn’t fall head over heels in love with the baby the moment I saw him. I wanted to. I didn’t. Maybe it had something to do with the C-section, maybe that’s just the way it is I’m learning that this is a more common feeling than the books tell you. There are quite a few people I’ve voiced this to who said, “oh yeah, I felt the same thing.” Really I was kind of exhausted. It’s not that I didn’t love Simon. But it was surreal. Now the bond is growing.

I didn’t expect that I would be so happy to go back to work at six weeks. I spent a lot of the pregnancy thinking he would be just too little and finding a way to make it work so that I could bring Simon to work with me. I ended up picking up a second class. I still bring him one day – I don’t get anything more than the necessities done. I enjoy the day I leave him. I don’t necessarily enjoy the second class and the 50 extra students, but professionally and intellectually, the days I can work without Simon interruptions are good ones. We are very lucky (I think that’s the best word for it) that Rob decided to take a break from working to be home. I don’t think he realized he would have quite so much full-time childcare, but it’s working for us. I don’t know that Rob is as happy about the now longer hiatus, but as a family it’s good for us. Rob will start working soonish, and we will reevaluate then the day to day childcare situation.

I didn’t expect that Rob would be just as exhausted as I am. Or that he would be a stay at home dad almost full time. While good for me to be able to go to work, it is emotionally and physically draining to be home all day several days in a row with a baby who turns from happy to mad in a second and refuses to eat from a bottle.

I always wanted to be a stay at home parent. I didn’t expect the guilt that would come with the being so happy to be away. But over time that is changing some too. There is a balance. Last week I worked a lot. A lot a lot, covering extra classes and working an extra day with a colleague who was in town for one day only. I was away from Simon almost three times longer than a normal week. That was too much. I hate pumping. Simon was tolerating the bottle one day a week, now he’s refusing them. He’s reverse cycling (this could be partly due to age) and his eating is all screwed up. He’s refusing to nurse during the day too. Again could be due to age and the world is too exciting to eat, or it could be because I’ve been gone and he’s “mad” at me, or he might have picked up the cold Rob and I are passing back and forth and just not feeling very well. The breastfeeding is one thing that has been going really well. I am so grateful that it’s pretty easy for both of us. I really don’t want to screw up my supply and go the pumping lots or formula route. Both are ok options, but right now it’s not what’s best for us. So I’m finding the balance of being away just enough to have the professional and intellectual stimulation I need (seems like 2 days that I really make count and some here and there when there are naps) and the being home that I want to want but don’t (and am doing because I really want to feed the baby). If I focus on being a mom and being with Simon and forget about everything else then my days at home go better. So I’m working on that. And getting him to eat when awake. He eats in his sleep just fine.

I didn’t expect that there would be days, many days where I questioned why I ever wanted a baby. He’s exhausting. And most parents probably feel this at some point or another. But we worked hard for a baby and are lucky to have him. Two Clo.mid cycles is relatively easy in the IF world. That adds a whole other layer of guilt to the hating the feeling of questioning wanting him. I don’t actually question it. We love him. I wouldn’t trade him for anything. But there are some bad days. With support of Rob and friends, and a good therapist I’m working on it. And the bad days are fewer and I think much more positively about Simon now.

I didn’t expect to feel so inadequate as a parent. That I would some days just have no idea what to do with this crying “thing” but just keep feeding and holding and loving him. Same good friend support – I now also know this is pretty normal.

I am coming to terms with the mom that I am. I am letting go of the mom I wanted to be, a combination of romanticism and perfection with a little bit of learning about myself as well. My mom told me last week that I’m not Superwoman. It kind of made me laugh at the time because it’s easy for me to forget that I am a bit of a perfectionist. My friends are great, a couple of weeks ago on a particularly exhausting day a friend told me this: our children are given to us and they have distinct personalities and many things to teach us. We have to be willing to learn. I’m watching Simon’s personality unfold and we’ll see what I have yet to learn about myself. And as a Developmental Psychologist, I know that his personality is his. There is not a lot I can do to change it, but as parents we can work with it and teach him the values we believe in.

Today is the last day of crazy schedules. I’m really looking forward to getting back into a routine of sorts.

*First picture is from the Beer Garden. All others from our day at the Queens County Farm Museum. Post on that coming soon.

3 Months

2011-10-12T21:28:00.000-04:00

Oh baby Simon. How is it that you are already three months old? 13 weeks. 92 days.

At your three month check-up you weighed in at 13 pounds 2 oz, 25 inches tall, and your head is 41 cm. Your growth has slowed down some no more 2 pound gains in a month, but you are right on track. I’m glad because you are starting to get heavy.

This month you’ve become interactive. You still love your robots (mobile). They make you smile and

wiggle. You smile and laugh all the time. You love motor noises. And when we bicycle your legs. We call your arm your laugh motor – if we shake your arms you crack up. You still prefer to stand, but can sit in the Bumbo seat without falling over and can sit with support on the floor. Tummy time is still a chore, but you can now lift your head and chest and have started rocking with your head and feet up. You will be rolling soon I think.

You’ve also started grasping things. Not with purpose yet, but if there is a toy or burp cloth (your favorite) then you hold it and flail it around with your crazy arms. You try and put things in your mouth now too. You're getting better at it.

You still eat all the time, and don’t love bottles. But that is ok because I don’t like pumping so much either. This has been a very busy month for me at school and there have been some extra Daddy / Simon days. The upside to this was enough days in a row at home for you to get to show your schedule. That you need an early morning nap and then one around 12:30 and again at 4. If you are swaddled you go right to sleep and sleep off the fussiness. Bedtime is a little rough. We did move you to the crib in your own room this month. A little sooner than I was ready for, but you are just too tall for the bassinet.

You slept 9.5 hours one night – then night there was a fire next door. We were up all night watching the firemen. And making sure you were ok with all the smoke that got inside. I think the smoke knocked you out some. For two weeks you did great a bedtime, fell right to sleep without crying and then slept 7 hours. Then you started crying a lot, finally calming down to eat again, and then sleeping 5 hours. This is where we are now. I really don’t want to do sleep training, but I really want to start sleeping soon. Since we are traveling to Indiana we will revisit your sleep at four months. I’m really hoping you figure it out yourself by then. Since I’ve been away so much I’m going with reverse cycling and doing my best to keep you fed at night. The bedtime chronicles are going to be a regular feature I fear.

Most of the time you are a smiley happy little guy. And you are starting to look an awful lot like your dad.

Saturday - 7:30am

2011-10-08T07:30:00.000-04:00

I was going to say I don't know why it seems I only blog every other week. But I know exactly why. I'm working like crazy. My 1.5 days away from Simon turned into 4 this week, and 3 the week before that and will be 3 again this week. I bought an electric pump. I kind of hate it, but it is necessary for the time I'm away and I really do want to keep breastfeeding. And I will full time again once I finish my project. So this week I taught a double load (4 classes) because my colleague was on her honeymoon. That's a lot of going to Staten Island. A very inconvenient time for me but oh well. Inconvenient because I have to present my second year research project (essentially my master's thesis) on the 18th in what will count as an oral defense. But oh, yeah, because I slacked off while pregnant thinking in some delision that I would have more time AFTER Simon came, it's not quite done. So I've spent every waking hour where I am not teaching or feeding (and even some when I am feeding) working on this. I have to practice at 11. I have 3 hours to finish - and somewhere in there get dressed and brush my hair... Here's a pic of what's going on right now with the boys in the house.

More blogging soon. I hope. I miss my blog.

end of summer garden.

2011-09-29T09:00:00.000-04:00

I've finally done it. I took a picture of the pepper that grew and ripened. It's ready to pick and eat. And when I did I saw that two more have grown. And these two are big.

Also after having teeny tiny strawberries all summer, we have four that are big. Big being relative. But they are still candy delicious.

I have a few more tomatoes coming in. The herbs are doing well. We pick and throw something in almost every meal. I think I won't do thyme or mint again. The basil, oregano, and rosemary are great. The parsley didn't grow so well, not sure why. Oh, yeah, it's because once I had the baby I completely neglected my plants. I'm glad I got a good start with them. It's the only reason they are still alive.

Oh, how I love my little garden.

Wordless Wednesday: Parrot Face!

2011-09-28T09:00:00.000-04:00

Cohort: Beer Garden

2011-09-27T09:00:00.002-04:00

Saturday we met up with a couple of grad school friends at the "original" Beer Garden. We took Simon. And just to show how "baby friendly" this place is during the day, you should have seen the 15 strollers and all the kids running and dancing (there is a dance floor). The photographic proof is in the party that was taking place one table over. Look closely, it's a first birthday! Am I getting an idea for next year? Maybe.

Svetlana and Marko had lots of fun with Simon. At the end of the day we were wiped. But oh, so much fun to hang out with friends and not think about school/work/the disaster area that was our apartment.

Marko testing that Simon really can stand - if you hold him up.

This may be my favorite.

Someone is very interested in the french fries...

Drool face.

It's pictures like this where I can see that I really do still have 10 lobs to go...

Big boy at the table.

Deep in thought.

Watching the big kids play.

Konked out.

After the Beer Garden, we stopped for a coffee to keep us going for the evening. You know for all the work we didn't do all day.

Simon's starting to grasp things. :)

Next time, I will plan more in advance so everyone can make it...

Wow, you're really playing house today.

2011-09-25T23:11:00.001-04:00

That's what Rob said when he saw that I actually SET THE TABLE, with the fancy dishes. Our apartment has been a disaster area recently. Simon was 11 weeks yesterday, so it's been approximately 12 weeks since we had a good deep clean. I've slowly gotten back into a normal routine, one that includes menu planning. Since we have so many CSA veggies and it's getting colder, I thought a roast would be nice. So this morning before church, and after probably the crappiest night of sleep to date, I put the roast and potatoes, onions, and beans in the crock pot. Even I can put together a meal that simple on almost no sleep.
After church Simon took a real nap and Rob and I cleaned. Then Rob kept cleaning between naps, and Simon took a SECOND nap. This is almost unheard of, but after reading a blog post on sleep, I thought that daytime swaddling may be in order, and it worked! Once the house was clean I put on REAL CLOTHES (and clean ones!), as opposed to the yoga pants and tanks I usually wear when it's just us. I asked Rob to put on a clean shirt. He wanted to know if it had to be fancy. Nope, but clean with no spit-up would be nice :)
Then I set the table, and "Wow, you're really playing house today." What's really sad is tat I can't remember the last time I made a nice meal for just us. I pull out the china a few times a year for just us, usually and I know that it's been a long time since that. But I can't remember the last time we planned a meal beyond it being dinner time and throwing something together.
So here is our dinner. Beef roast with potatoes, onions, and beans, crescent rolls, and a bottle of wine.

Here we are in our clean clothes.

Simon napped (again!) during dinner.

And just to show how awesome I am I even made dessert. Using the CSA pears. Pear tarts, which are pears in brown sugar on biscuits with cream. Rob did whip the cream. And what I like about this dessert is even if you screw it up, it's just fruit and sugar, so still tastes good.

The best part - we have breakfast and lunch out of the leftovers. Oh, and the clean living room, that's pretty awesome too.

Why we sleep in the crib now.

2011-09-23T18:26:00.000-04:00

Just to hold you over til I finally get around to posting two month pics, and the baptism, and my garden update...
Can you believe how big he is. This is why Simon now sleeps in the big boy crib and uses the seat in the stroller, he's too tall for the bassinet.

For comparison here he is in his first week.

And also he's in the crib cause he loves his robot mobile. Video to come...

US Open

2011-09-20T08:00:00.000-04:00

Last weekend Alison, James, and Andrew came to visit and attend the US Open. What I remembered about myself is that I really love watching sports. It doesn't matter what so much as long as it's live and in person. So the tennis was awesome. The downside was that the rain caused some rescheduling that led to Alison and I taking Simon to a VERY late night match on Saturday. We saw the women's semis and the men's doubles final. The final started at 11:57 and because so few people stayed we got to go courtside. That was cool. And Simon did so great in his three days of attendance.

The boys got to meet their cousin for the first time and we did some touring of Manhattan. A trip to Chinatown and Wo Hop, a walk across the Brooklyn Bridge, so shopping and more eating. Rob and the boys even got to take in a show (Spiderman). Overall a fun trip.

This picture is for Andrew who wanted to know what all the empty tracks were for. Well they are only empty during the day. At night it's where the 7 trains park until morning rush hours.

Anonymous

2011-09-19T20:14:00.000-04:00

Today has been one of those days where I kind of wish I blogged anonymously. Then I could tell the Internet all about it. Instead Rob gets an earful of venting when I get home. Since I don't want to publicly state it all, the short version is today I got to spend my afternoon dealing with the crap part of teaching that I really really hate. The part that extinguishes any of the growing feeling of "OK, maybe I could stay in academics and teach" completely. The part that reminds me why I stopped wanting to teach 10 years ago. The thing is I don't actually disagree with the problem. I disagree with being notified of it 3 weeks into a semester and the quick fix is to change the curriculum I've been working on for almost a year (and would affect almost 600 students). We're working on a solution. But seriously, I've cursed more today than I have in the past year. Probably not really, but it feels like it.

Today I am STILL dealing with a paperwork issue that should have been resolved in JUNE when I made a special trip in while 37 weeks pregnant to find some documents were missing. They were sent. I am now told they are missing again and the person who can fix it does not return email or phone calls.

Not anonymously, Simon was with me. And it was the first day I was kind of glad he was. BUT due to some miscommunication, the babysitter didn't show, so that was fun... And he went through 3 outfits by 2 o'clock. His current onesie has both poo and pee stains and I just don't care. Because he's not getting another outfit before pajama time. Which is soon.

BUT Simon smiles now. And he laughs. And Ellen down the hall can get him to do almost a real belly laugh. And it's so cute it makes me cry. So despite all the stress, there is good. And I'm kind of most excited that the fall TV season starts tonight.

Photo Essay: A Day in the Life

2011-09-18T22:27:00.000-04:00

Last weeks rundown of my Monday went over well. I got some laughs and a lot of how hectic my day was. After I posted that, I saw this post on baby rabies with a challenge to record an ordinary day with a photo an hour. She was going to do hers on Wednesday. I was up to the challenge, but Tuesday we were out all day and the baby had his 2 month appointment, and I didn't have my camera. Wednesday the rabbit broke his leg. Thursday I was at CSI again sans baby. Friday Simon and I went to a meeting at school for most of the day. Saturday I realized that we just don't have an "ordinary" stay-at-home day. EVER. I am back to working and we are just constantly on the go. So I picked today. It's as ordinary a day as we get. You can see Jill's day here, as well as links to mine and other ordinary days in photos.

4:45 am

This is my attempt to take a photo in low light with no flash so as not to wake Simon after he ate. This was the end of a 6.5 hour stretch and I really wanted to go back to sleep.

7:35 am

When we're actually ready to get up for the day. Look at Simon in his big boy crib.

8:30 am

Well some of us were ready to get up. Simon laying with Rob while I take a shower and get dressed. Don't worry Rob was awake enough to not drop or roll over Simon.

9:30 am

Simon napping in the swing. Me in front of 4 of the 5 loads of laundry I did yesterday and did not fold. Oh, so much laundry.

10:20

On our way to church.

12:15 pm

I meant to take a picture during church, but Simon is on a new eat/wake/nap schedule (thank you 6.5 hours) and I haven't quite figured it out, thus missing the 11 o'clock hour. Here we are with friends after the service during snack time.

1:15 pm

Time for lunch.

2:15pm

Stuy town to visit friends.

3:45 pm

Playing with friends.

4:45 pm

Walking to Union Square to catch the subway home.

5:25 pm

Waiting at Grand Central. Weekend trains suck.

6:30

Love those baby smiles. And checking email. Too many student emails that I don't want to deal with tonight. This is why there is always tomorrow. I"ll stick with the baby smile tonight.

7:15 pm

Dinner. Nachos. Yum.

8:10 pm

Bath time. It's becoming a more regular occurrence as Simon is getting smelly when I don't bathe him often enough. He's starting to tolerate his baths, I wouldn't say he likes them quite yet.

9:10 pm

Pretending to sleep while we watch some football and wait for Simon to wake up for his last feed before going down for the night.

9:30 pm

He's up. And eating again while I blog.

10:15 pm

Ending the day much like we began.

And here's hoping it actually is the end of the day because tomorrow is Monday and we all learned what Monday is like last week...

Two Months

2011-09-17T11:00:00.000-04:00

Oh baby boy! You are getting so big. At 2 months Simon weighs in at 12 pounds even (52%) and 24.5 inches long (95%); tall and skinny. The two month vaccines were great at the doctor, you whined for about 3 seconds then turned and smiled at me. But at night it wasn't quite such smooth sailing. A super fussy evening and lots more crying than usual. Some Tylenol and swaddling put you right to sleep.

In the last few weeks so much has changed. Smiles are big time...for everyone but mama. When we are out you are a charmer smiling and grinning at most everyone. When you aren't fussing and your Daddy asks you to smile you usually do. I have to work a bit harder for them. That might not really be true, but sure feels that way sometimes. You have laughed a few times. Laughing gives you the hiccups. You know your mama and daddy, when we come into the room or talk to you, you turn and light up. That is pretty cool.

You are so strong. You love to stand. If we put you next to the Monkey's cage and wrap your hands around the bars you stand for a few seconds on your own. Standing up and looking at the world is your favorite thing to do. You are starting to grasp things, but when you do it's a little surprising and it's not deliberate yet. You really hate tummy time, but all of the standing has helped you build neck control.

We've had lots of company this month. It's so much fun to see family and you've been to Coney Island and the US Open, and many many restaurants. But it's also nice to be back on our own schedule. You aren't sleeping great, it's been a complete meltdown, then 4-5 hours. But you are so so happy when you wake up in the morning that I kind of forget about the rough night.

I started working again, so you come with me one day and then you have a day and a half with Dad. It's going great for me, but you and Dad still have a few things to work out.

Broken Bunny

2011-09-14T17:55:00.000-04:00

So this morning Rob noticed that the Monkey wasn't using his front leg. We think he got it caught in the cage bars sometime over the weekend. So Rob and Monkey and Simon went to the Vet. And Monkey got an X-Ray and a hot pink cast.

Me: "At least it wasn't the baby with the broken leg."

Rob: "Yeah, but the baby has insurance..."

For the next 4-6 weeks he is cage bound and we are praying it heals. Because really I do NOT want to deal with the alternatives. Sad bunny.

A Day in the Life: 12th of September

2011-09-12T19:27:00.001-04:00

I started blogging four years ago on Wednesday. One of those early, first month I was blogging posts was a rundown of my crazy day. I was thinking today that I should do a play-by-play post and remembered that early one. You can read about that day, I started at 5:15, I'm guessing I went to bed the night before between 10 and midnight. It's funny how my life is so different, yet still very much the same.

I'm going to start this day at midnight, due to no longer sleeping through the night.

Midnight - Go to bed after folding baby laundry and finishing prepping for my class today.
2:ish am - FEED THE BABY
4:54 am - FEED THE BABY
6:15 am - FEED THE BABY
6:20 am - Alarm goes off, it's NPR so I let it play
6:25 am - Put baby back in bassinet and hit snooze so I can sleep 10 more minutes before getting up
7:14 am - Overslept, wake to radio, get up start shower and ask Rob to please change and dress the baby. So glad I laid out clothes and diapers last night.
7:35 - Pump for five minutes so baby has a snack
7:48 am - Leave for CSI with Simon. Only 10 minutes late, but no time for either of us to have breakfast (and I never got around to packing lunch either)
8:05 am - on the 7 train.
8:34 am - on the Express Bus to SI
10:00 am - arrive at the lab where I work, FEED THE BABY drink some water, eat an energy bar
10:10 am - Simon charms the office ladies, I check my mailbox
10:15 am - check email and respond to students, count photocopies for class, random class prep stuff, meet with a student, Anna (a fellow grad student, who has generously agreed to childcare) arrives and I go over Simon's care (diapers, bottle, etc...)
10:55 am - FEED THE BABY
11:10 am - teach my class
1:10 pm - finish class meet with a student, pick up the baby, who is freaking out in the hall, on the way to the office with student to fix a schedule problem.
1:15 pm - give Simon back to Anna so I can sign some papers
1:20 pm - FEED THE BABY who is like OMG I am starving and you never FEED ME
1:50 pm - Simon is asleep. Eat an energy bar, drink some water. Answer student emails, work on online class prep.
2:10 pm - meet with Patty
2:15 pm - meet with another student
2:30 pm - head to office to fix more scheduling things.
2:45 pm - BABY woke up and OMG you left me alone and I don't know where I am and I am going to FREAK OUT
2:50 pm - FEED THE BABY
3:00 pm - Simon is happy, start working on the three things I MUST finish before leaving (two of them are sending two sentence emails...)
3:30 pm - Simon has had ENOUGH of work today. Meet with Naomi.
3:50 pm - Finish last email. Pack up.
4:00 pm - leave the lab
4:15 pm - Express Bus back to Manhattan, think about reading for class on Wednesday, take a nap instead.
5:15 pm - On the 7 train
5:48 pm - Arrive home and OMG I woke up and I don't care that you are wearing me in the carrier I don't know where I am and am going to FREAK OUT, and I'm really wet and I think you forgot to feed me today.
5:50 pm - change the baby
5:53 om - FEED THE BABy
6:00 pm - ask Rob to please turn on the US Open because I'm still FEEDING THE BABY
6:10 pm - hand the baby to the Daddy and eat a pudding cup
6:50 pm - FEED THE BABY
7:00 pm - Pour a glass of wine, and blog, the veggie lasagna (thank you Tammy!) is almost done.
7:02 pm - Simon FREAKS OUT again. Rob has him, he's not wet, dirty, or hungry. Rob plays his least favorite game "Cry Until Your Tired" Simon lost around 7:20. He sleeps until he'll be ready to eat again soon.

Kind of ready for bed now. The rest of the night will include eating dinner, watching tennis, watching Bachelorpad #guiltypleasure, and bed by 10:30 - I hope. And of course there will be more FEEDING THE BABY.

Tomorrow we go to the doctor for our 2 month shots.

*Simon travels in the Ergo carrier on these trips. He pretty much sleeps the entire time. I can feed him in it if I need to.
*I do NOT eat enough on CSI days. Kind of no time, but I'm working on it. Usually if I pack something I eat it, but it might take a couple of hours. The second energy bar today actually took two "sessions"

Busy Bee

2011-09-08T10:54:00.000-04:00

More family in town, a cranky baby, and not having the camera and the cord and the computer all readily available due to cleaning for said family make for the great blogging start that I had last month come to a screeching halt.
In the past week we have had:
three sets of family visitors
been to Coney Island
the Natural History Mueseum
the US Open (today)
started back to class and teaching
and been to countless restaurants
oh, and we baptized the baby and threw a party for 14 people

Soon, I will blog again. With pictures!

{this moment}

2011-09-02T09:00:00.000-04:00

{This moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, visit Soulemama to leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see.

Wordless Wednesday: So Big!

2011-08-31T09:00:00.000-04:00

coming home - so tiny in the seat

6 weeks - his head is above the insert, we took it out for the ride home

Carousel

2011-08-30T09:30:00.000-04:00

Rob and I rode the Bug Carousel when we were dating and went to the Bronx Zoo. We took our engagement pictures on the Central Park Carousel. We've ridden carousels at Flushing Meadows, Rye Playland, and Six Flags. Something about a good merry-go-round makes me smile. When Simon is bigger I can't wait to take him on the one in Bryant Park.

Congress Park in Saratoga has a restored carousel. The tails are made of real horse tails! Of course we had to ride and take Simon on his first ride. Since he was only 6.5 weeks old at the time we decided it was best he ride in the stationary carriage. But that didn't stop us from taking some pictures on the horses first.

First Carousel Ride of what I hope will be many more to come.

Saratoga Sunrise

2011-08-29T09:00:00.000-04:00

We spent last week in Saratoga. In addition to taking the rabbit for walks we went to the track and walked through town.

Race day is a bit to much for us to handle with Simon right now. So we went to breakfast at the track and watched the early morning practice. I've been wanting to do this since I first visited Saratoga in 2006, but since you have to be there by 7 am sleep has always won. Now that I have a little alarm clock, 7am is no problem. We had an entire day by 10 am.

Once he woke up Simon really did watch the horses some. He made all the jockey's smile. And there was at least one other family pointing out the horses to a much to young infant.

On the way home from the track we stopped in to see the grounds of Yaddo. We saw an exhibit at the library a couple of years ago and have been wanting to visit. Most is closed to the public, but here is the house and the garden.

When we got home our little eskimo was ready for a nap. Like I said a whole day before 10 am. And so glad I packed the pants and jacket. Perfect fall weather all week.

Oh, Irene

2011-08-28T21:30:00.000-04:00

We missed the earthquake last week, but were back just in time for Hurricane Irene. MTA shutdown, grocery stores out of water, everyone out of batteries. We were lucky. Many areas lost power, hopefully not for too long. New Jersey was hit hard. There was lots of flooding, we had none of that. We prepared for Irene by going to the grocery for our normal shopping trip mostly because we needed food. Saturday morning I filled up all of our pitchers and water bottles, just in case. We have a flashlight, matches, and candles.

Yesterday morning we took a walk to get out before the storm hit. We had light to moderate rain on and off yesterday. Lots of rain overnight. Our window is leaking...again...ugh...since they just "fixed" it. Since it was fixed a year ago, this fix really made it worse. This morning Irene made landfall in New York. A tropical storm now. Once she passed, the back end was lovely. A bit of sunshine, a light rain, the smell of fall in the air. A leaky window, I'm glad that's the worst of it. But now I need to get the window fixed.

the worst destruction we could find

After the weather cleared, we went for a Sunday afternoon walk. Business as usual in Sunnyside. Many restaurants and shops were open. The park was full. This tree, kindly leaning against the car rather than smashing it, was the worst damage we came across. Lots of leaves down. Last weekends thunderstorm was worse. Again, we were lucky.

flying a kite in the park

As a bonus to me, classes are cancelled tomorrow. I'm assuming in part because the MTA won't be up and running until later in the day tomorrow and no one can get to school.

What Rob Did: Monkey's Paradise

2011-08-27T09:00:00.004-04:00

We took our first family trip this week, up to Saratoga Springs to visit my cousins in their trailer in the woods. Of course Simon was coming, a second use for the car seat, and we had the conversation of what to do with the rabbit. We have two usual options, 1) pack him up and drop him off with Josh, a huge pain for us, or 2) leave him home and have Josh or someone come feed him each day, a pain for them. Peggi and Tyrone have 2 dogs and 4 birds, so we decided to just bring him along to join the menagerie. Monkey and the dogs met last Thanksgiving and were fine together. But since they did spook each other a bit and the trailer and porch have lots of hidey holes for a rabbit Rob did what he's been wanting to for awhile. He bought a lead for Monkey. It wraps around his neck and under his front legs keeping him secure. The rationale was so Monkey could be out on the porch without getting stuck in a hidey hole or darting away from a curious dog.

But what he really wanted to do was take Monkey for a walk. Outside. In the wild woods. I don't know why this made me so anxious, but it did. However, after the first time when I saw it was fine I stopped worrying an Monkey got twice daily walks. He found a fern grove just outside the porch and made a beeline for it as soon as his little feet hit the ground. he even chewed himself a clearing.

Rob and Monkey and Peggi had such a good time on these walks. I think Monkey is probably the saddest of all of us to be home again. It means back to his cage.

And just so you can see how fast he is. Here are some videos.

{this moment}

2011-08-26T11:40:00.000-04:00

Birth Story Part 2: at the hospital and a change in plans

2011-08-26T11:09:00.001-04:00

The (really, really) long version continued: Part 1 HERE *If you don't want all the labor details about the epidural and lack of progress start at the astriks at 1PM.

We got to labor and delivery around 2:30 and I was taken to triage. I was not so fond of the nurse who was in charge of checking me in. She wasn't friendly and she kept asking me questions while I was unable to talk, hello contraction, and then would keep asking until I answered. Needless to say I snapped at her from the pain and then she was all like "well that is an unnecessary tone." I apologized, but really don't think I needed to. Rob was too stressed out by my pain to remember to answer the questions - like "do you want an epidural" or "how long have you been in labor" - for me, hence the snapping I was then put on the monitors and checked. 90% effaced, -2 station, 5 cm dilated. Woo hoo! I'm halfway there or something.

At this point I was still committed to my epidural free birth. It was a very busy night in labor and delivery, so I was in triage until a little after 5am. In this time they never came to take me off the monitors so I couldn't move. Not that the cramps would have allowed for much of that anyhow. The nurse also came in to put in my IV. This was during a moment of high pain, so I wasn't with it enough to say hep lock only. Rob was in a chair across the room. He could get a little closer but not too much because of all the machines. At some point I was in pain, and Rob wasn't able to help me and I couldn't move and I started to think the epidural wasn't such a bad idea. (**I really don't know if some of these things were different if I would have made a different decision or not regarding the epidural) At 5 when the nurse came to tell me my room was almost ready. I said I was thinking maybe an epidural, they took this to mean call the anesthesiologist right now. On my way to the room the nurse grabbed me around the waist, to help me walk I guess, and I snapped don't touch me. Again she was offended, but she didn't ask or say anything, and if someone was going to help me I would prefer it be Rob and I really didn't want anyone touching me at that point.

When I got to the room the anesthesiologist was waiting. I was ok with it and ready but if you aren't sure don't say you are thinking about it. My justification to myself for the epidural was I can't move around anyhow, so I might as well not move and be comfortable. And I was exhausted as I had been in labor and constant (no breaks between contractions) for 11 hours. When asked for my pain scale the contractions were around an 8 and the breaks a 4 or 5. The epidural went in fine, it's probably best that policy is Rob had to wait in the hall. I did have a very nice med student who wanted to observe and she held my hands. The hardest part of this was sitting upright and still as it went in. As soon as it took I had an absence of pain between contractions. During this time I stayed on the lowest dose with no "booster" drug because I did still want to feel the contractions. But I was finally able to rest. And even sleep a little. Rob however, was in an upright chair again. I should also point out that due to heat and watching too much Netflix we had both only slept about 3 hours on Thursday night and had now been awake all night Friday night. When the shift changed at 7:30 and my new nurse came in, I was actually smiling feeling pretty refreshed for all the catnaps. Rob was looking pretty rough and the first thing the nurse did was go find him a recliner. I told Rob to call my parents and let them know we were at the hospital (funny story in itself) and then to sleep for awhile. The nurse gave him a blanket and he kind of did. My doctor, Dr. S was on L & D for the weekend. So she came in at 8 and checked me again. 5 cm! At this point I was super glad of the epidural because if I had been in labor with lots of pain for 5 additional hours and knew I hadn't progressed I would have been pretty stressed. Dr. S broke my water and there were meconium in the fluid. She wasn't worried but said we'd have to check the baby when he came out. The also gave me an internal contraction monitor.

At 11 Dr. S checked me again. 7cm. I had progressed, but slower than they would like. They like to see 1cm/hour. Dr. S said to go another hour and then maybe give me pitocin to speed things along. I was ok with this and Rob and I chatted and I was feeling pretty good. At noon I was starting to have back labor. At this point I figured if I had an epidural, I might as well have the epidural and asked for another dose. Dr. S said to hold on though because maybe I was ready to push. No progress. And the baby's heart rate had not been recovering super well from the decels. (*If I had not had the epidural I would have asked for not constant monitors, so this may or may not have been a factor). I got the booster dose of epidural. Then Dr. S gave me an internal heart rate monitor for the baby and an oxygen mask for me. She also said no pitocen because that would possibly put the baby in distress and mentioned that if things didn't start moving we'd think about a C-section. She'd come back in an hour.

The mention of a C-section was scary. I wasn't concerned, still thinking I would progress and all would be well. Rob got choked up though. Surgery means bad things *could* also happen to me, and we both really wanted to avoid surgery. We were both teary and choked up and talked a little about it, but weren't really left alone long enough to process big feelings. And we were processing that the baby could be in trouble. The internal monitor is SCARY. It's a loud ticking sound that gets slower as his heart rate drops. And then sometimes just stops - this is a transmission error from the baby or me moving around - which is about the most terrifying thing ever. The nurse said the heart would never just stop like that, but I asked he to turn off the sound anyway. She didn't do that, but did turn it as low as it would go. (As a side note the contraction monitor has a loud alarm that signals a paper jam. I think that alarms should really be reserved for actual emergencies for parents sanity.)

***
At 1 o'clock Dr. S came back. Still no progress. Ugh. She said C-section. And meant like right now. This is when Rob and I both got a little scared and choked up. I trust my doctor, and if she is saying this it needs to happen. But still, not what we wanted. I had been in the room for 8 hours and in labor for 19. She said most people would be parents by now. She didn't know what the hold-up was but my cervix was starting to swell and he was possible too big. She didn't want to wait, because it didn't seem I would progress, and didn't want to risk pitocin. She brought the paperwork I signed and then things started moving lightening fast.

waiting in the hallway

The nurse brought scrubs for Rob and started telling us about the prep. We were both teary and still processing. I asked for a few minutes. The nurse cleared the room. Rob and I both broke down sobbing. He sat on the bed and we hugged and were talking a little to comfort each other. I swear we got 90 seconds before the room was full again and everything was starting. This was not enough time for either of us to really be ok with the C-section. Or enough time to stop crying uncontrollably. I was given more epidural, enough for surgery and they started prepping me. Rob went to the bathroom, I think to cry and wash his face, and THEY TOOK ME. I know Rob was going to have to wait outside until they were ready to start the surgery, but I didn't want him coming out of the bathroom to find me gone either. I told them to have someone wait for him. I have no idea if anyone did, but he was directed to outside the OR, so I guess someone did.

Through all of this I could not stop crying. I finally asked to take the oxygen mask off because I couldn't breathe. I felt like it was suffocating me. I asked for a kleenex to blow my nose, the best they could do was a blanket, I have no idea whose bare hand I put the snot covered blanket in when I was done. I was trying to be all business, but I couldn't stop crying. Hormones and drugs I blame it on. Oh, and I was still a little scared, and my husband was in a hallway somewhere. I got the sense the staff was used to that though because everyone in the OR was very calming and soothing and nice about it. Everyone also explained exactly what they were doing even though I couldn't see or feel below my chest. I was also FREEZING. The epidural made my legs and upper back really cold, so they put pressure warming boots on. The extra saline made my arm cold, so extra warm blankets on my chest and arms. In addition to crying I now couldn't stop shaking. I was worried I was going to shake to much for them to do the surgery, then I remembered I was numb and nothing down there was actually moving.

first pic

Rob was brought in and he had the camera. His eyes were all red. I told him "you have to hold it together from here on out because I'm not going to be able to" All of this happened within 15 minutes of being told we were having a C-section. I cried through the whole surgery. Getting Simon out was pretty quick. They started cutting at 1:21 and he was born at 1:41. The way he was turned and his size made it take a bit to get him out. I could feel the tugging and Dr. S talking about turning him. Once he came out he was given directly to the pediatrician. He wasn't held up for me to see or brought over. He didn't cry immediately, but within a few seconds. I don't know what went on with Simon at this time, normal newborn stuff I suppose. When Rob went with him to the nursery they said they wanted to monitor his breathing and that this was common after a C-section.

mad

I do know that I was out of it enough Dr. S did not ask us his name. I sent Rob over to take pictures so I could see my baby. He took some pictures and came back to show me. The nurses called him back over to hold the baby after about 10 minutes and Rob brought him over to me. The nurses took our first family photos. We look rough in these pics. Raw emotion. I looked at them for the first time a month later and they made me teary.

finally seeing Simon (about 10 min post birth)

family

Some notes on things to remember if and when we ever have another baby:
1. Written checklist for Rob to look at both at home and in the hospital (remind K to drink water, ask every 30 minutes "what can i do", answer to all hospital questions and THEN ANSWER FOR YOUR WIFE) If he can't remember to answer then HAND THE LIST TO THE NURSE.
2. Ask to be taken off the monitors after 20 minutes in triage (also on husband list)
3. Say no to the IV in triage (also on husband list)
4. If there is no reclining chair for the husband in L & D, ASK for one
5. Ask for intermittent rather than constant BP monitoring. I had major bruising from the cuff
6. DO NOT sign consent forms for anything until you are actually ready. If you need a few minutes say so BEFORE not after you sign. Otherwise you get no time.

first time holding Simon (6:15 pm)

The birth was traumatic, that's really the only way I can describe it. But it's been almost 7 weeks not, and the raw feeling is subsiding. I have no regrets about having the C-section. I really feel it was the way he was going to get here. I would change a few things about the overall experience, see the list above, but I don't feel like I was cheated out of a vaginal delivery. I was asked around 4 weeks if I would go though labor again, since I did for 19 hours and all, and I said yes without hesitating. This surprised me, because until that day I was seriously thinking I could be ok with one baby ever. But if I am lucky enough to have a second, I would go through labor and Dr. S said there is no reason I couldn't have a VBAC. She said he was big, 7.5 pounds doesn't sound that big, but maybe he was. He was also turned with his face 3/4 to the front, causing my back labor and making it hard to descend, I think this was the bigger problem, but that is just my opinion.

Six Weeks

2011-08-23T07:41:00.000-04:00

Dear Simon,

You are six weeks old. I took some pictures on your one month birthday - you're getting so big. Someday soon I will get them from the camera to the computer. Taking care of you is a full time job. I may never get pictures and posts synchronized again. You're first week home was full of family visits and help with you and the apartment while I recovered. You slept a lot and there was lots of time spent on your bean bag pillow snuggled against my side. Week two it was just you and me. We had friends drop in every day for lunch and to cuddle with you. You also started to spend more time awake. Your daddy and I didn't know what to do with you since you were still so little. Sleeping time was easy, we slept or worked. Awake time was a learning curve.

Weeks 3 and 4 you really started to chunk up and put on some babyfat rolls. These are the best. You rolled over from your belly to your back twice one night. You were really mad. The first time you started propped on a pillow, but the second was all you. When you are awake you hate to be lying on your back. You prefer to be upright, either carried or standing. You are so strong and love to move. We are going to have our hands full when you start moving for real. We borrowed a bumbo seat for you. You're not quite big enough for it, you need to get a little better at head control, but your first night in you loved it.

You've change so much in six weeks. And not just how you've grown. We visited your doctor on your one month birthday. She said you were growing great. At your appointment you weren’t yet focusing on our faces when we talked to you. But at 5 weeks you looked right at us. What a difference a week makes! At 5 weeks you also gave us your first big smile! You have two dimples, just like your Dad. This makes us all happy. We’ve spent a lot of the last two weeks trying to get you to smile again. And you don’t give them up for just anything. Every time we see a smile it’s like a celebration. I’m sure this will change, but it is your best “trick” to date. Your other trick is when we blow on your face you will stick out your tongue like you are tasting the air. When you were first born you looked just like me. But now you are staring to look more like your dad. You still have my nose and lips. Your hair has gotten lighter, but I'm so happy it didn't fall out. It makes me smile how it sticks up all over the place.

Sleep has been pretty consistent. You give us one long stretch of about 5 hours most nights. To maximize our rest we start this between 9 and 11pm. Your pretty good about eating and going right back to sleep around 3. Technically you are only getting up once at night. When you wake up around 6 you are so happy for the first hour you are up before you nap again. This is when you play with Daddy, while I shower and get ready. Your newest thing, which we would love for you to grow out of is a super fussy period from around 7 until 9. Nothing makes you feel better. These are your evening fussies. You fuss yourself to sleep then wake up an hour later ready to party – but really it’s bed time.

To let all of your adoring fans (the fam, far away) keep up with you we try to send a photo or video a day out in an email. They love it. And we love when they come and visit. They are always sending or bringing your presents, like the outfit in the pictures. And you have a bin full of toys, now you just need to get big enough to play with them.

Your Uncle Josh is the lucky one. He lives close by so can see you in person whenever he wants. You two are going to be good buddies. He was your first baby sitter and has kept you twice already while we've gone out to dinner.

Baby boy. You are a lot of hard work. 24/7 didn't have real meaning until now. You keep us on our toes. But, as you grow and now notice us, you are getting more and more fun to have around. I think we’ll keep you :)

Friends

2011-08-20T09:45:00.001-04:00

Last night we ventured to Brooklyn for a BBQ on Jess and Bill's new patio. This was the first time we took Simon on the bus in the stroller. And the first time bigger kids were around him to play with him. Playing with Simon meant tickling his feet, really the only place that toddler hands can touch.

this was the best I could get. do you know how hard it is to get 3 boys to look at the camera and smile. at the same time. impossible.

We got this picture just before leaving to try and beat the torrential downpour. So appreciative that Bill gave us a ride home. And that they have car seats. And that one is convertible to rear facing

Birth Story Part 1: labor at home

2011-08-20T09:40:00.000-04:00

The short version:
I went past my due date. I had a non-stress test and saw my doctor, Dr. S, Friday July 8. At that appointment she stripped my membranes and told me she was on call all weekend and hoped to see me back before my induction date of July 12. I went home and worked on my research project all afternoon. Around 5:30 I had a strong contraction. At 6 they started for real. We went to the hospital at 2:30 and I was 5 cm. I got an epidural and at 8 I was still 5 cm so Dr. S broke my water. At 11 I had progressed to 7 cm, which was slow, so Dr. S wanted to watch me for an hour and maybe give pitocin to speed things up. At 12, no progress, Simon wasn't recovering from the decels (heart rate slowing during contractions) well so they put me on oxygen and said I may need a C-section if I didn't progress. At 1 pm I was told it was time for a C-section. I wasn't progressing, and my cervix was starting to swell. Simon wasn't in distress, but they didn't want to get to a point where he was. They wheeled me to the OR and Simon was born at 1:41.

The (really, really) long version: **To my family and friends, I'm writing this in detail for me, I need to process it all one more time in writing and then move on. I'm also writing because I found it helpful to read other people's birth stories. Be warned for lots of medical and emotional detail.

After wanting and trying for a baby for so long, we were excited and a little stunned when we found out I was pregnant. I spent approximately the entire nine months planning and prepping for him, including how we wanted the delivery to go. After reading many many blogs and seeing "The Business of Being Born" I was interested in a drug free labor and delivery. At 26 weeks I passed out during the blood draw for the glucose test and decided that the thought of lots of needles stressed me out way more than the thought of labor pain. That's when I started really researching, but also reserving the right to change my mind at any time. I read both of Ina Mae Gaskin's books and also The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding (the absolute most helpful book I read and am re-reading now). My doctor, Dr. S, was on board with my plans. I never wrote an actual birth plan. At some point during my blog reading I came across this plan "Bring home live baby." While my struggle with IF was relatively easy and I am not coming from a place of miscarriage or still birth, the sentiment behind this stuck with me. Because really, getting Simon here safely was the main thing.

That said, when Rob and I talked about what we wanted from the birthing experience (mostly me talking) I wanted to stay at home as long as possible, I wanted to stay drug free, and we both wanted to avoid a C-section. That one was probably the most important. Oh, how the best laid plans change.

At my 40w 4d appointment I asked Dr. S to strip my membranes. I was about 60% effaced and 1.5 cm dilated. I had mild to moderate cramping all afternoon while I sat on the couch and worked on finishing up some research things that I had been putting off. Since my mom was coming the next day (Saturday) for the week and my induction was set, this was my last chance to get it all done before the baby

At 5:30 I felt a HUGE contraction compared to what I had been feeling (nothing compared to what was to come) and I talked to Sara (BFF who happens to also be an OB) on her way home from work. Everything seemed pretty normal. At 6pm I got what were the WORST period like cramps of my life. The debilitating kind where all I want to do is curl up on the bathroom floor and sleep for a week. And maybe throw up some. Of course this started right around the time we were eating dinner. By 7pm I couldn't move and only picked at my food. Around this time I started feeling contractions on top of the cramping. They were far apart but pretty regular. The worst part for me was no break from pain. Ever. The whole time I was at home. I thought maybe I had misunderstood everything I had read, that there was a contraction and then a rest period. I've talked to enough people that I believe this is generally true. I never had that rest, because between contractions I still had the WORST CRAMPS OF MY LIFE.

I still hadn't finished my research items that were due, so I laid on the couch curled up and worked from that position. Around 9 I told Rob I was done, and I thought this was probably real labor and I needed to focus on it. I dictated an email for Rob to send for me with the bazillion attachments I had been working on, apologized for any incoherency and said I'd deal with questions in a few weeks. At 10 Rob convinced me to call the hospital to make sure that this was IT. The doctor on call said it sounded like early labor and to take a shower, it would help. It did not help. I couldn't stand up in the shower because standing made me want to throw up. I did want to throw up though, I was hoping that would relieve the pressure in my stomach. I laid in a warm bath for awhile. This also did nothing, but it was easier to stay there than move to get out. One thing that did help some was sitting on the toilet and leaning my arms and head on a stool.

For all the prep work we had done in my reading and our childbirth class, we really didn't or couldn't use any of it. Because of the cramps I couldn't move and the only position that was ~~comfortable~~ tolerable was the fetal position (which is not on the labor positions list). I didn't want to be touched at all as my skin was crawling. We did finally find that if Rob massaged my forearms and hands that helped. At one point Rob told me he didn't know how I was still going because when he gets headaches they weren't this bad. But he was stressed because I was in pain and I kept having to remind him to rub my arms or tell me to drink water, or talk to me through the contraction.

At 11:30 I finally threw up. Hallelujah! I felt better for about 2 hours, and could finally use some of the labor prep. In this two hours I was finally able to sit on the exercise ball. Sitting there leaning on the bed and Rob pressed ice packs wrapped in towels on my lower back. The pressure and the cold felt nice during contractions. I was also able to walk around during this time which helped. The contractions were about every 5 minutes at this point and the cramping wasn't so bad (but the contractions were stronger). I laid in bed around 12:30 and told Rob to try and sleep. At 1:15 I got back in the shower. The cramps were back in full force and the contractions were really hurting. They were lasting about a minute and it was getting harder to talk through them. Around 2 Rob and I decided that since I had been in labor 8 hours, we had no idea how far along I was, and the pain was really intense, that it was probably time to go to the hospital. I called and talked to Dr. L again and she said to come on. I told Rob to take a shower while I finished getting ready. I braided my hair - I would highly recommend this if you have long hair - to keep it out of my face and I knew it would stay up for a couple of days, and packed the last few things in the hospital bag.

We called the car service, which came in about 5 minutes, and rode to the hospital which took about 10. Another thing I knew was that I wanted to leave for the hospital before 5 when rush hour starts. This was the most painful car ride ever. The NYC roads are not the smoothest. Contractions were super strong and close together. When we got there we used the ER entrance and were directed to labor and delivery. Walking was not happening so much and I rested against the wall a lot.

continued in Part 2

Wordless Wednesday: Blog Star

2011-08-17T08:30:00.002-04:00

*bib from Target, saw it on a blog and had to have it. my mama went and found it for me.

Super Baby!

2011-08-14T13:57:00.000-04:00

Emily and Scott arrived Saturday morning and we headed to Park Ave for Summer Streets. Simon of course was dressed to impress in his "superbaby" costume. Yes, I put my baby in a cape for funny pictures. He doesn't quite look like he's flying, but it's the best we could do.

Last night Grandpa and Marilyn got in. Today we are doing lots of this...

Some Notes

2011-08-12T20:31:00.000-04:00

This made me laugh. Last Friday we took Simon in the Ergo carrier to do some errands in the city. One was to drop off a library book. They check your bags when you enter and leave. Rob opened the diaper bag and I followed him, but was stopped to check my "bag." The guards expression was priceless when I said "it's a baby" and pulled back the sleep hood of the carrier.

Monday we went to see Harry Potter 7.2 Simon was great. We went to the 12:45 show, the first one of the day. There were only about 30 people in the theater with us. Simon ate or slept all but the last 20 minutes when I walked him in the aisle by the exit. We can totally do movies with a baby...for a few more weeks anyway.

Simon Kenton, one month

Tuesday was the big One Month well visit. Wow! one month. The Squeaker (that's his latest nickname because he squeaks all. the. time. and it's hilarious) weighed in at 10 pounds 3 ounces (60%) His weight gain is awesome at about 2 oz a day right now, it will slow down. His height was 21.25 inches but I know this was wrong, he was 21 at birth and is much longer now. We are going to work on getting him to cooperate and stretch his legs for next month. No shots this time around, next month we start the vaccinations.

Anniversary Date 8/10/11

Wednesday was our third anniversary. I really can't believe it's only been three years. I can remember life without the Squeaker, I have a hard time doing the same for Rob. It's been fun, it's still fun, and I hope it stays that way. Josh came over to babysit. I fed Simon right before we left. We went to Saffron Garden, an Indian restaurant a few blocks away. It was very empty, then we remembered it was 7 on a Wednesday. The food was good, but I think our old favorites are still our favorites. After dinner we took a walk then stopped at the wine bar, Claret for a glass of wine and the creme brulee. We were gone for 2.5 hours. Josh got to change his first diaper and baby was still alive when we got home. I really liked fixing my hair, wearing make-up (something I only really do for occasions anyhow) and wear a dress that did not have to be appropriate for nursing. Date night = awesome.

BlogHer, the blogging conference I went to last year was in San Diego last weekend. I was excited to see where it would be next year, thinking that could be a nice vacation. It's in New York, again. Which is disappointing because it means no travel, but good because it means I am absolutely going. And I think I will also attend Pathfinder day for the pre-conference workshops. Maybe I will meet some bloggy friends for real - anyone out there think you might come? Blogging is a hobby that I have stuck with for almost 4 years now, that's epic for me. I want to keep evolving as a blogger and building new relationships.

Rob has been home for two weeks now. It's awesome. I am just getting to a point where I think I could tackle a trip to Manhattan on my own, I did it a couple of weeks ago and was on the couch for two days recovering. Two of us makes it almost easy. It's great to have the family time. And also the tag team because taking care of a newborn is EXHAUSTING. I finally really get what 24/7 is because you have to be on top of it always. I can't be away from Simon for more than a couple of hours due to feeding, but Rob can take care of him, bring him to me, and take him again. So I'm getting some longer stretches of rest.

on the steps of the Met, 8/3/11

Last week (in addition to the Friday funny) we took the stroller in to run errands and had lunch at the Shake Shack. Some day when I have a computer again all of my ipod photos will be available for blogging, even though the quality is not so great. Then Wednesday we went to the Met. Simon was our ticket to the front of the excessively long line to see the Alexander McQueen exhibit Savage Beauty. One of the line attendants saw us and gave us a pass to go right to the front because of the baby. Woot!

roof of the Met, 8/3/11

My adviser and another grad student came to visit yesterday. We mostly looked at and talked about the baby. But also got me up to speed on a few things for the fall semester. I'm looking forward to it this year. I'm teaching a class and taking a class and finishing two papers. I get to take Simon with me to the lab the day I teach, and someone will watch him during the class time. The day I have a class I'm going to leave him home with Rob because it will only be 3 hours of away time. When Rob starts back to work we'll come up with a new plan.

My sister and dad are coming tomorrow with their SOs. I'm really looking forward to it. Emily hasn't seen him yet in person, and my dad saw him at 1 week. He's gained THREE POUNDS in the last four weeks so he's going to seem HUGE.

Have a great weekend!

Wordless Wednesday: Happy Anniversary

2011-08-10T11:00:00.000-04:00

Babies Don't Keep

2011-08-09T08:30:00.001-04:00

So I really wanted to have it together enough to do a post like THIS ONE during the first week home with Simon. However baby rabies (one of the blogs I read) also wrote this post with the poem Babies Don't Keep. The poem also shows up in the Le Leche League book "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" and the last bit was even in the hospital's discharge packet. Rather than show you what our apartment has looked like over the past month, has is really been a month, I'll show you our little "chubbins." We estimate he's gained about 3 pounds this month, hence the many nicknames about the adorable fat rolls he's growing. Instead of cleaning and working and blogging, I've been doing a lot of the following:

Babies Don’t Keep
by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,

Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,

Hang out the washing, make up the bed,

Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?

She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,

Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.

Dishes are waiting and bills are past due

Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo

The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew

And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo

But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo

Look! Aren’t his eyes the most wonderful hue?

Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow

But children grow up as I’ve learned to my sorrow.

So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!

I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

We've been napping and rocking and playing and crying. He's been loved by his grandmas and grandpa and uncle and aunties. Rob has been home, so we've been going out. Our family time has been wonderful as we are getting to know the little man. And the poem is so true, babies don't keep. Our newborn is so big now and growing and changing so fast.

Regular Blogging Returning This Week!

2011-08-08T17:10:00.000-04:00

Well, I've taken a nice little break with Simon. But I'm ready to reenter the real world, or at least my fake internet one. Birth announcements were ordered. I feel like this is quite an accomplishment at our one month (tomorrow) birthday. Here's a little sneak peak - or what the card looks like. I HEART Shutterfly.

Photo Card

View the entire collection of cards.

Over the next weeks, I'll show you what the past month has looked like. And school is starting again soon, so there will be some glimpses of my non-baby life, if that even exists anymore :)

This Moment

2011-07-22T09:35:00.000-04:00

He's Here!

2011-07-18T11:52:00.001-04:00

Simon Kenton Powers

July 9, 2011 - 1:41 pm

7 lbs. 8.5 oz., 21 inches long

Rob bringing him to see me see me for the first time.

I'll leave you with some eye candy. He's changed so much in the week since these were taken. We love him to bits. I'm on a bit of a bloggy break as we all adjust to being a family of three (plus the bunny).

First Harvest

2011-07-08T13:26:00.000-04:00

The first five tomatoes were ripe last week. I have four more almost ready today. We picked them and along with some basil and oregano made homemade pizza. Yum!

We also tasted the first of the tiny strawberries. I don't know a lot about berry growing, but I'm pretty sure the pots are restricting their growth. And because this is the first year they've produced, I think they might be bigger next year. We'll see. But we ate them. And it was like eating a strawberry candy. a super sweet concentrated taste of strawberry explosion.

Also this year, the wildflower seeds I planted look like they are about to bloom in another of the pots. And the marigold is still alive. This is the best luck I've ever had with flowering things. Our little container garden along with our CSA share makes me almost feel like I have a real garden.

Birthday Boy

2011-07-07T10:06:00.000-04:00

The birthday boy decided he didn't want cake this year, so I made him these Strawberry Ninjas I found on Pinterest. They are a little sad and Rob says they look more like Santas. Next time we will dip the strawberries in chocolate first.

The day was pretty low key. We spent the morning cleaning. So not what should happen on a birthday and the afternoon napping. Then we went out to dinner. Tuesday was a bit of a better birthday day. We went to the MoMA for lunch. The cafe we wanted to eat at was closed for unknown reasons, so we ate at a different one. Then walked around the sculpture garden. The food is pretty good, but expensive. However, we knew that going in, and being members we don't have to pay for the museum.

I love this guy and am glad he gets to keep his special day all to himself.

now about that bathrooom

2011-07-05T09:00:00.002-04:00

We are incredibly lucky to have a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom condo. I use the second bathroom for keeping a lot of my stuff. And I fix my hair in there, because when we are both working and getting ready at the same time, it is nice to have my own space.

in March. see the bathtub 'o stuff in the mirror

But I've always showered in the master bath. less to clean that way. With the exception of when Josh was living with us, and a few times that we've had visitors, it is functioning as a half-bath. Meaning most of the time we use the bathtub in there as a closet.

When I started to accumulate baby stuff, into the tub it went. Because there certainly wasn't room for it in the disaster area we once called an office.

When we replaced the utility cabinet with the crib. The baby stuff went to the crib or dresser and the books and things from the cabinet took up residence in the tub. Along with the ill-fated bedding until it's return.

We've decided to give cloth diapering a shot. We don't have a washing machine, but we do have machines in the building. And I know a few people in the neighborhood who do it. It will be a challenge at first, but if we can make it work will save us lots of money. Even better, I've managed to get quite a few for free from Mom's who are cutting down their stash. But back to that bathroom.

Because cloth diapering will require some rinsing of things in the toilet. And because of our space constraints I thought it would be nice to keep all things nice in the bathroom. I gave Rob a description of what I wanted. And he modeled it for me. Then my Dad helped me get the wood and we put it all together.

What is it? Why, a changing table and shelves that fit into that not currently used second bathtub. The books and things from the cabinet have found home on the re-organized shelving and closets elsewhere in the apartment. The baby stuff is put away.

Behind the curtain is the seat for our stroller, until we are done with the bassinet attachment. Also are the pack-and-play and baby bathtub that I got for free from other moms and we may or may not keep depending on usefulness. It's also a great place to keep the "goodwill bag" that I take every few months to donate whatever gets tossed in there as I am constantly purging.

The top shelf is the changing pad, some diapers, wipes, and baby lotions creams, etc... The second shelf has cloth diapers and behind the bins are all of our extra towels and baby bath supplies which I can get to from the side. The bottom shelf holds the g-diapers, all disposable inserts, a pack of disposable diapers and extra toilet paper that I buy in the 20 pack.

All in all it is a great use of creating new storage. And one day when the kid needs his own bathtub the shelving is easily removable and the baby stuff stored there will no longer be needed.

Due.

2011-07-04T18:06:00.000-04:00

Today is my due date. As of Friday's appointment we are still waiting. Lots and lots of waiting. My fingers and ankles and feet are swollen, but not so bad that most people would notice. Thank goodness I own a pair of flip flops though. I usually reserve them for the pool or beach, but my sandals no longer fit. At Fridays appointment I was up 40 pounds, but today it was only 35. So that is my final weight gain fluctuation. I'm good with that. The clothes in these pictures so don't fit anymore, but I wanted the outfit for comparison. I have enough to get me through a week, but since I'm mostly staying home, I am re-wearing as much as possible. My waist is still 42 inches around. Baby boy has definitely dropped.

We spent the weekend cleaning. And by we, I mean mostly Rob. I helped some but he did the bulk of the work. We also have the bassinet table in place. We covered a remnant piece of plywood with batting and fabric and it is supported under the mattress and on the bookshelf, perfect table for the bassinet (which is also part of the stroller). The baby will sleep bedside for awhile. Our living room seems so big when it's clean. And we also wonder how we fit so much in here to begin with.

"Baby, when are you coming???"

Rob is betting the baby will come Wednesday July 6, on his birthday. It will be a post of it's own if he has to make his own birthday cake. I think it will be Thursday or Monday. Regardless, we check in Monday night for a Tuesday morning induction.

To continue the Birthday Week celebrations we went to see Transformers this morning. We went to the 10:20AM show. What we have learned is that the weekend of the 4th is a great time to see movies, because most of the world is at the beach or a BBQ or not at the movies. Especially not in the morning. There were about 12 people in the theater, amazing for an opening weekend. The early morning also meant we aren't taking chances that I "might" go into labor tonight. I'm not counting on it. Tomorrow we have a quick doctor appointment then are spending the afternoon at the MoMA and eating lunch in the cafe there.

Here is a quick morphing movie Rob put together of the growing belly. It hasn't gotten a ton bigger in 7 weeks, but you can see growth. This is 21, 33, and 40 weeks. You can also reference THIS post from a few weeks ago with the side by side shot.

my baby's room: the after

2011-07-02T09:00:00.003-04:00

Evolution of a Room

chapter 3

We've gone through a lot, this room and I. And now it is ready for a baby. Once I made the decision to go with the robots. And the robot bank was mine. I returned the deer bedding. Once that was done I had much less anxiety. I started cleaning out the crib and putting baby clothes in the dresser. We started putting things on the shelves and tossing even more. The under crib space is used for storing our new suitcases (officially carry-on size), the air mattress, extra paint, and some other odds and ends. There is still a ways to go in purging and organizing, but the room is ready.

I have made peace with the fact that my home will never be "finished." It will never be 100% clean and organized. That's life. I'm ok with that. Most of the time. Here is the reveal:

We hung the Robots Fighting painting under the existing shelves filled with some of our childhood favorites and toys we've collected.

And I found some orange sheets in crib size. These are NOT easy to come by. Most baby sheets are in pastels and blue and pink and maybe green and yellow. I was really excited to find the orange.

The monkey mat is living here for now, but it's kind of like a pillow friend for an infant and will likely move around the apartment as a soft place to lay the baby.

I found the mobile on Amazon for $9.99, which is the perfect price, since once he can pull up I'll probably have to take it down. It plays Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

I'm still not sure about how and where to hang the art. I like the Monko cells and how they match. The one in the window needs to go somewhere, it is usually stacked with the other art we don't know what to do with or don't have room for. The fisherman boards don't really go, but again, not sure where to move them.

But the dresser looks nice. I have a couple of pictures of us, and frame that will have Simon's first day picture in it once he gets here. The bank and the lamp are perfect! Baby monitor is plugged in. The bead necklace I bought from a friend at a craft fair recently. I figure it will be something I can wear once he is teething and starts chewing on me...

These are the rain gutter shelves we put behind the door. The lowest one is about 15 inches from the floor, so perfect for board books. The next shelf holds the paper books for kids. The upper shelves are for extra CDs, DVDs, video games, and odds and ends. Someday when we purge some more Simon can use them for his things.

The play mat is a perfect size. And the baby toys are in an orange tote that I've had forever. It used to hold our extra towels.

And here is Rob's side of the room. Because it is a Nursery / Office combo. And I still have the closet. Someday I will have to give that up as well... The boxes to the right of the desk hold all of the crafting and crafting tools. We hope to replace the giant box with a cabinet or something similar soon.

Overall I think it works well. Here's to hoping the sharing works well.

And my final project for the room. Or my next crafting project. I bought all of this fabric, among other things, with money I got from returning the deer bedding. I want to make the quilt in the picture on the bottom left. So that when Simon gets big, and we convert the crib to a toddler bed he will have the perfect quilt. So I have a long time frame. And if I actually finish before the toddler years, it will be a great blanket.

Birthday Week for Rob

2011-07-01T18:00:00.000-04:00

Today is the official start of Rob's Birthday Week. He will be 34 on July 6th. However, there is a chance that the baby will forever ruin Rob's birthday, because if they have to share we all know Rob will take the backseat. We want to make this birthday a good one, but we also knew we should start early. When Rob said he'd like to see a show for his birthday I bought the tickets. For May 31. To see The Book of Morman, which is a pretty hot ticket to get right now.

When I bought the tickets there were only partial view seats (boxes) available until mid-August. But since we live here I just asked for the best available seats in May or June. That's what we got. The downside to box seats is we missed action on the far right, but not such a big deal. The upside is that we were in real chairs so it was easier to move as needed and Rob had LEG ROOM!

Our location also made it a prime spot to scan the audience for famous people. I am not so great at spotting celebrities. I once literally walked into Hank Azaria on 42nd Street and didn't recognize him. Rob pointed it out once I'd apologized for my clumsiness and we were out of earshot. But the woman behind us recognized Jack Nicholson sitting just below us. There were also some other well know theater folk in attendance, but I didn't recognize those names.

in the blue and black about to sit down

We had no camera on this outing, so the iPod photos throughout this post will have to do. I know you can't really tell, but trust me, it's him.

in the blue and black behind the two guys in blue

Happy Birthday Week to my awesome husband who puts up with so much from me!

Also on the agenda for birthday week: 1) dinner this past Wednesday at Salt & Fat, the new hot restaurant in the 'hood 2) Transformers 3 and brunch one morning this weekend 3) an activity or meal TBD 4) cake at home, maybe with a few friends over 5) most likely have a baby